"Dude, you just don't masturbate in the the library!"

[VG Emblem]

Ok, completely true story here, no joke.

A few days ago, me and my sister went to go do some errands. The first one was to go mail something at the post office. Then, when we were done with that, we start crossing the street to get back to the bus. In the middle of the street, some guy walking the opposite way of us says extremely loudly in his cellphone "Dude, you just don't masturbate in the library!"

It was like the funniest thing ever. It was some guy who looked like he was from a middle eastern country, and he was so serious about it. Usually I hate these loud-ass motherfuckers who can't talk quietly into a cellphone and blurt everything out loudly for all to hear. But this was magnificent. I'm still laughing as I try to possibly think what the conversation he was having was about. (Even though I do have a general idea, lol.)

So, any other weird/funny moments like this ever happen to anyone here?
Discuss.

[Kalypso]

Daaaack

[MagnuScruB]

and i was like... amilllllioooooooooooooooo

[DaDesiCanadian]

So, I says to Mabel I says...

[VG Emblem]

Wtf?
Nice one, tards.

[thepeopleschamp]

Ok, completely true story here, no joke.

A few days ago, me and my sister went to go do some errands. The first one was to go mail something at the post office. Then, when we were done with that, we start crossing the street to get back to the bus. In the middle of the street, some guy walking the opposite way of us says extremely loudly in his cellphone "Dude, you just don't masturbate in the library!"

It was like the funniest thing ever. It was some guy who looked like he was from a middle eastern country, and he was so serious about it. Usually I hate these loud-ass motherfuckers who can't talk quietly into a cellphone and blurt everything out loudly for all to hear. But this was magnificent. I'm still laughing as I try to possibly think what the conversation he was having was about. (Even though I do have a general idea, lol.)

So, any other weird/funny moments like this ever happen to anyone here?
Discuss.


Ha ha ha! Some crazy shit happens in the library! I know mine at college was notorius was getting together and fooling around. I remember seeing this smokin' girl going down on some dude in the corner of the library. It's one of those things you don't want to see, and sorta do want to see if the girls hot enough.
BTW dude I posted you a message in the flame thread. Can't seem to get the pm to work.

[Roxie]

Secrets of Pick-Up Artists

Drunk guy: Lemme get a bacon, egg, and cheese.
Cashier: Sorry, we don't have bacon.
Drunk guy: Can I have it on a bagel then?
Cashier: That's not the problem. We don't have any bacon.
Drunk guy: Can I just have a bacon, egg and cheese?
Cashier: Sir, there is no bacon, ok?
Drunk guy: Can I just have your number then?

--Dunkin' Donuts, 83rd St.

Overheard by: Maunica
Dreadlocked guy: I'm a customer and you're saying I can't use the restroom?

Ambiguously ethnic deli owner: You can't use it this often. You come here every day and stay there for 20-25 minutes. I don't know what you're doing in there.

Dreadlocked guy: Well if you want to get so technical, the first time I was taking a dump.

--34th & 1st


Overheard In New York (http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/)

[quiche]

"If it weren't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college."

...seriously.

[ocelot_357]

*At FR9*
Conversation with my friend dr.funkenstien aka sammy and jackie tran.

JT: I bet you a bowl pack you can't guess what kind of asian I am.
dr.f: vietamese
JT: FUCK.
dr.f: Do you speak the language?
JT: SHHHHH stfu theres a vietamese convention going on next door and I don't know what the fuck there saying!

[CrotchMonkey]

Hahaha that second quote Roxie is too good.

[Roxie]

:rofl: Even I heard about that!!

Here's another OHiNY

I'm Late for My Exorcism

Old lady: Hey, you know what time it is? You got a face so pretty, I swear I'll have to cut you if you don't tell me what time it is.
Guy: Five thirty.

--Penn Station


Overheard by: Romanoff

Another Major Deposit

Thug #1: I heard he's in some shit. Married, two kids, child support,
a wife, girl on the side, and she just found out about his boyfriend.
Thug #2: Yeah, that's some shit.

--15th & 3rd


Overheard by: Garrett Ricciardi

[Raziel321]

haha actually this reminds me one time i was walking around at my job and this mexican guy was on his cell phone and i over heard him say

"Clean your teeth, because when i get home i want a blow job"

[VA_King]

it reminds me of a time when this guy said "i didn't do it officer".


well we have your license plate and there is grass under your car.

[Raziel321]

that was pretty funny man

[VA_King]

that was pretty funny man

lol. i was wondering where the thread went. :wgrin:

[VG Emblem]

BTW dude I posted you a message in the flame thread. Can't seem to get the pm to work.
PMs aren't working? Wtf?

[Warpticon]

One time when I was in college, I was walking behind this guy and this girl. I had a lot on my mind, really wasn't paying attention to their conversation or anything. Suddenly, for some reason, I snapped out of it, and the only part of the conversation I heard was the girl saying "But what if I bite his cock off?"

I crossed the street.

[Hokuto no Jeffro]

If anybody listens to Loveline on KROQ, then this shouldn't sound too weird.
Caller: Um, hello. Me and my boyfriend were having sex, we heard this cracking sound.... We lokked at his penis, and it was.... bent.

Also for all the Dodgers have the best food guys ever. You haven't experienced baseball until an 80 year old geriatric yells "PeaNUTS!" into your ear.

[VG Emblem]

Alright my thread has officially turned creepy! Hoorah!

[Rico!]

hmmm ok at my college there's this really dumb fake blonde asian bimbo girl. I pass by her and a professor talking and heard this:

Her: is there anyway you can help me?
Him: first off Carol, I'm not your professor this semester, and second, the english department doesnt hold tests on saturdays.

[OMG AntiAir Dust]

"If it weren't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college."

...seriously.

I love this one.

[ckrazy]

i can see the dude standing ther yelling

"Dude, you just don't masturbate in the library!" all day
because he know people can hear him and really no one masturbatin in the library... i know some people that just make up stupid shiet and yell them out really loud so people can hear

[VG Emblem]

i can see the dude standing ther yelling

"Dude, you just don't masturbate in the library!" all day
because he know people can hear him and really no one masturbatin in the library... i know some people that just make up stupid shiet and yell them out really loud so people can hear
Sadly enough, if I were to ever get a cellphone, my only reason would be to pull off stupid shit like that.

[PcLanAdmin2]

"If it weren't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college."

...seriously.


HAHA, Lewis Black's the best