What's your take on this? Do friends and Money Mix?

[ducvader]

What do you guys think? Does it work? What are some of your experiences when it comes to this topic?



Duc


Edit 9-20-06 : This topic is regarding loaning people money and trusting them to pay you back. Yes I know studiotraffic will stick with me for the rest of my life in this community and I have already explained myself about the whole situation on ALPHAISM radio ( That's for you BEN!) where I actually was on the radio and willing to answer any questions regarding ST from anyone listening. And hells no!!! - JOHN HORAN and money will never mix - I wished I knew who that guy or group of people were. I know am responsible for bringing ST here and I apologize to anyone who got hurt. It was not intentional. Can we now stick with the topic? Thanks

[evilj]

My manager says "If you want to make your friends your enemies, loan them money."

I guess if you have enough money to lend a friend, don't always expect it back. I know a super arcade guy who was dumb enough to lend 200 or 500 to a "top player" in mvc2 for weed, that top player never came back to super :(

[Adam Warlock]

What do you guys think? Does it work? What are some of your experiences when it comes to this topic?



Duc

Hell no. The last time I trusted a "friend" with money matters, I got jacked for a G in studio traffic loot.

[AgantK7]

Friends and money mix only amongst my "inner circle" of friends. I have the kind of friends who I can borrow $100 from and they'd expect to be paid back with a session or two. I'd do the same for them. My close friends are like family. I can walk in thier house say "Hey mom" to their parents and proceed to raid their fridge... when they're not home. I expect the same from them.
-K7

[Gasaraki]

Well, like AgantK7, the only people I would let borrow money from me or ask to borrow money from them is my "inner circle" which would total at 2 people. They're the kind I can trust to pay me back in some form or fashion and they know I'd do the same for them as well.

Of course we're not talking large sums of money either, $200 is ridiculous. I'm talking like $50 at the most and most of the time it's just paying for each others meals or something small like that.

[Devil X]

a small amount like, 20 here, 20 there isnt too bad. large sums of money can only lead to problems though. the only way I would lend a friend any significant amount of money is if he got arrested for some bOshit and needed to be bailed out. and he would have to be one of my close friends. i wouldnt even lend a good friend 500 for weed, much less some marvel player :rofl:

[Ducky]

Close friends can borrow about $100 or so for short times, only if you know they are good on it. Friends try to take advantage of shit too often, so fuck handing out money, since you won't get it back from a lot of people. Keep business, business, and friends, friends.

[coffeerox]

Hell no it doesnt mix. I've found that if you figure out how responsible they really are, that ties in with how much money you can loan or entrust them with. I know one that got loaned 60 bucks to buy Oblivion, b/c he really wanted it that bad, and when it came down to paying a friend back, he didn't b/c he came up w/ some bullshit about his cell phone, which he could have turned off and paid his friend.

This friend of ours I know is really loyal and he is generous w/ his cash. It was sad to see this happen. If it was me, I'd have paid him back as soon as I had 60 to do so. I've had a friend that worked as hard as I did. If there was ever a money problem, we'd hook each other up until the next payday and that was cool as hell. He bought me Tales of Destiny II when I was a few days off from payday and didn't have any in savings, let me borrow Luigi's Mansion when I just got my GCN and didn't have enough for a game.

Of course that's all small stuff. I would never expect anything more than 60 and if an offer was made, I wouldn't accept it, nor would I offer, its just plain rude, you don't do that to friends.

[9999]

Hell no. The last time I trusted a "friend" with money matters, I got jacked for a G in studio traffic loot.

:lol: That does suck though.

As for lending friends money, I sure do, but only to the ones I KNOW will pay me back, you gotta know who your friends are.

[snakedizzle209]

Fuck no. Of all the times/people I've loaned money to I've only gotten less than maybe 10% back. Theres only one guy who has consistenly payed me back. He's the only guy I trust and even he has flaked a few times.

[lseelba]

Hell no. The last time I trusted a "friend" with money matters, I got jacked for a G in studio traffic loot.

You win the thread, but I don't think 9999 knows what you are talking about :clap:

[fishjie]

if i give money away to friends, such as when im buying for dinner, i dont expect to see any of it back ever. thats just the attitude i have when it comes to money, and it works out. less drama that way. if you actually get the money back, its like finding money on the ground :rofl:

for stuff like when were goin on a trip and i gotta pay the hotel, they are good for the money right away, and i in return. it works out better that way.

[9999]

You win the thread, but I don't think 9999 knows what you are talking about :clap:

Oh I know, I *almost* signed up for that a while ago. Glad I didnt.

[spudlyff8fan]

I probably wouldn't trust my money with my friends if I had money.

But if you're going to go to a strip club, make sure you print out fake money. The place is too dark and the strippers are too busy to see if it's real[/Good Man Show]

[Nick T.]

No, because i'm jew like that.

[MagnetiX]

Only my really close, inner-circle friends like people have said.
I'll loan out $20 at the most though, nothing more.

[DaDesiCanadian]

Never Forget.

[Soujiro Seta]

"Neither a borrower nor a lender be," as the saying goes. It's true.

When you loan out money to a friend, your friendship actually works at a disadvantage, compared to if you loaned money to someone like a co-worker or someone else with whom your relationship was more professional. A friend will take the friendship status as an 'unlimited grace period' to defer their re-payment. They'll get money, but there will always be something else requiring their financial attention, and since you're a friend, they can put you off while they take care of their other monetary concerns.

Being a friend, you don't want to press them about it, but eventually you'll be saying "Uh...hey, remember that $XX you borrowed from me?" They'll say that they definitely haven't forgotten, and that they'll pay you back "really soon." Of course, they don't, and because you addressed the issue before, they don't want to have to give the same excuse again, so they start avoiding you because now, instead of a friend, you are first and foremost a foreboding creditor, out to get money from them. It supercedes friendship, in the mind of the borrower. At other times, the borrower will try to do "nice things" for the person they borrowed money from, trying to build up a covert counter-balance so that when asked about the debt again, they can say "Well, I bought you some drinks last time; we're even!," which of course is bullshit (especially if you didn't consent to that as repayment).

If you ARE going to loan money to a friend, think of two things. First, think "Would I give this person the money if I knew I would never be paid back?" And secondly, "Can I afford to loan out money myself?" If you approach friend-loans as 'charity donations,' you'll tend to self-regulate, because you'll realize that you'll either never see that money again or put dents in your friendship trying to get it back. This isn't to say that you can't help friends out - you should want to help out a friend, and in many cases be willing. Just be aware that you've gotta cover yourself first - you can't go loaning out $200 to someone to help them break even, because if they're struggling so hard in the first place, where exactly is the money to pay you back gonna come from?

[Night]

The max I do is cover for someone's lunch. Anything more, nope. And I only lend money to people who have a job, and I know how much they make so I know I can expect that money back in a reasonable time and I end up lending it when I catch him in a "no cash on him" situation. I don't even care how much I lend out really or the fact that I pretty much covered a max of 10 bucks... I care more about him paying it back so he shows his sense of responsibility. If he covers for lunch the next time, perfect.

[mr. newbie]

sure like $5 to the really good ones.

[Nu.]

Interesting thread with an interesting twist with who is initially asking this question... With all that went on I'd of thought he would have disappeared from these forums.

Anyways, to keep on topic... Rarely does it work when it comes to large sums m'thinks.

[BornAgainCommunist]

Me: Hey man... whats up... long time no see.

Freind: yeah...hey.... Wow!! you look different.

Me: Yeah... you know me..(me laugh) ... running and gunning.... Ive been sick though... it sucks....

Freind: Yeah man...that sucks....so anyway... I just got married!!

Me: Really!! thats badass...can i borrow some money?

Freind: hehe... how did you? ..uh where did you find me? how?...uh...

Me: hee hee.... its ok bro... im not here to kill you.... hee hee.

Freind: You are going to kill me, arent you?.... dude im sorry i ripped you off.... i have a good life now. Seriously bro....(crying)...i just wanna live my life....(sobs)

Me: ok...ok... I seriously wont bother you anymore. In fact, you can consider yourself protected.... (evil laugh)... but do you think you could give me money for a pack of Newports?

Freind: fo shizzle (sniffle).... later yo.

[TS]

I don't lend out money I expect to get back. If it's more than $5 for gas, you're gonna have a hard time convincing me to loan it to you.

[Adam Warlock]

Interesting thread with an interesting twist with who is initially asking this question... With all that went on I'd of thought he would have disappeared from these forums.


Exactly. When Ricky stiffed the cannons everybody jumped on his shit and tried to blackball him from the community.

Duc jacks half of GD and niggas are still on his nuts like they were Planter's.

[AdverseSolutions]

hey duc, how did john horan mix with money? well?

[Koop]

Exactly. When Ricky stiffed the cannons everybody jumped on his shit and tried to blackball him from the community.

Duc jacks half of GD and niggas are still on his nuts like they were Planter's.


..........
















fuck :sweat::sweat::sweat::sweat:








touche??????? good point?????

[skisonic]

Exactly. When Ricky stiffed the cannons everybody jumped on his shit and tried to blackball him from the community.

Duc jacks half of GD and niggas are still on his nuts like they were Planter's.

Everybody jumped on his shit and tried to blackball him huh? wha? He was all over the place, he just wasn't allowed at srk events. How was he blackballed?

[mr. newbie]

ricky stifed the cannons?

[ramza]

I don't know. Just because you can trust them as a friend, doesn't necessarily mean you can trust them with monetary situations. I've seen these situations ruin friendships. To the point where the only way to recoup the money was to go to the guy's parents.

[Return of Shiki]

This is another example of "Least Qualified Authors".

[The Bucket Of Truth]

if i give money away to friends, such as when im buying for dinner, i dont expect to see any of it back ever. thats just the attitude i have when it comes to money, and it works out. less drama that way. if you actually get the money back, its like finding money on the ground :rofl:despite my mexican nature (not having a real job and hording food stamps when i can) if im out with friends i have no problem shouting them and in return they usually cover me when im short. i could never really stay friends with people who werent like this, all jewish with money you know

[XTG]

friends should have no problem signing a loaner/borrower contract, keeps both parties honest and further strengthens the friendship within set guidelines during a monetary transaction

[KrassHole]

friends should have no problem signing a loaner/borrower contract, keeps both parties honest and further strengthens the friendship within set guidelines during a monetary transaction

Yea I can imagine how that'd go down.

Friend: Yo man can you spot me $20 for the day?

You: Sure buddy, lets just draft up the appropriate documents and we're all set.

Friend: You're a fucking douche bag.

[The Bucket Of Truth]

Friend: You're a fucking douche bag.haha

[arcticninja]

I can and do lend money to my friends without a second thought. Then again, I don't make friends with deadbeats.

[Satomiblood]

It really depends on what kind of friend it is. I mean, are they the ones that'll only show up when they're low on cash? Hell, I've got issues with loaning family money. It's not because they won't pay me back. It's because I hate taking out money that I've been saving for MYSELF. I know that's selfish, but unless it's a life/death situation, I'm not going to give someone what I've been earning. But if I'm with friends or family and I'm spotting them for gas, food, or a movie ticket, I'm down. If I'm nice enough, I might even treat them. I'll draw the line when they start asking for $100 and beyond, though.

[The Bucket Of Truth]

u r a jew

[insanelee]

what kind fo friends do you guys have that you guys are worried about loaning $5-$10 jesus christ.

bronson.

[Satomiblood]

u r a jew

Not really, but I love kanishes and I'd fuck Sarah Silverman.

[Geese Pants]

This reminds me of the Family Guy episode where Stewie loaned Brian some money and Stewie aksed for his money back................hilarity.

"Where's mah money?"

[Agmaster]

Yup. I owed people upwhere's around $500 recently and paid them all back. Straight up if I can't afford it to be gone I ain't going to part with it in teh first place. And if they can't handle being bothered about it, they really don't want to borrow it in teh first place.

[L1qu1d]

no friends and money absolutley do not mix....unless youre real tight and making it together....otherwise no it could potentially fuck up your "friendship"

[Airthrow]

"Neither a borrower nor a lender be," as the saying goes. It's true.

When you loan out money to a friend, your friendship actually works at a disadvantage, compared to if you loaned money to someone like a co-worker or someone else with whom your relationship was more professional.

No. NEVER lend to a co-worker because you don't have the recourse of getting thuggish if motherfucker doesn't pay you back. I let a co-worker who didn't have a place to stay, stay in my crib for 10 days on the agreement he would give me a small sum. I took a HUGE RISK to be a good guy cus I thought he was a good guy down on his luck. The risk being he would steal all my shit, etc.

He said "Don't worry thanks so much for letting me stay, I won't forget our agreement", little motherfucker banged two bitches in my crib and doesn't have the decency to pay my MEASLY amount, that's a grimey motherfucker. And I would get in his fucking face but I can't lose my job cus I work with him.

Only lend money to family and friends when you don't expect shit back.

Edit: What is up with female co-workers always begging for small amounts of money? Fuck you ho, be a fucking adult and bring your own moneyfor lunch, I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOUR FUCKING NAME YOU FUCKING BUM.

[platinum_pinoy]

$2 or $3, I wouldn't mind (not all the time, though). More than $20? I think I would lend that kind of scratch with collateral in mind.

Friend: "Hey, can I borrow $200?"

Me: "Sure, no problem. Give me your PS3 and I'll return it when you pay me back."

[Pryde]

No. NEVER lend to a co-worker because you don't have the recourse of getting thuggish if motherfucker doesn't pay you back. I let a co-worker who didn't have a place to stay, stay in my crib for 10 days on the agreement he would give me a small sum. I took a HUGE RISK to be a good guy cus I thought he was a good guy down on his luck. The risk being he would steal all my shit, etc.

He said "Don't worry thanks so much for letting me stay, I won't forget our agreement", little motherfucker banged two bitches in my crib and doesn't have the decency to pay my MEASLY amount, that's a grimey motherfucker. And I would get in his fucking face but I can't lose my job cus I work with him.

Only lend money to family and friends when you don't expect shit back.

Edit: What is up with female co-workers always begging for small amounts of money? Fuck you ho, be a fucking adult and bring your own moneyfor lunch, I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOUR FUCKING NAME YOU FUCKING BUM.


Ouch, did that fool even clean the fucking bed sheets? or the couch, ewwww, watch out for them crabs on your couch/bed

in other words, friends comes and go, you can always tests people on how true they are to you through money. I'm a big spender myself, i have no problem spending on friends or family, as long as i know how true they are to me. i can go out to a club and easily blow a grand on friends (i've done it before) as long as they are cool with me, but it doens't mean i'll do it all the time. I don't mind spotting a friend a 20 here or there, cuz they'd do the same for me. I've ever loaned my friend 6 grand before, got it back in 2 months. no problem, you just gotta know wat type of situation your friends are in and what they need the money for.

Shit like, hey can you spot me 20 bux before dinner so I can look like have money when we're paying for food is fine, but when it happens more than 3 times, drop that nigga, cuz he's just gonna do it again. but i would like to say 75% of the time, money and friends don't mix at all.

[glass]

No.

filler.

[Kyoujin]

Well, like AgantK7, the only people I would let borrow money from me or ask to borrow money from them is my "inner circle" which would total at 2 people. They're the kind I can trust to pay me back in some form or fashion and they know I'd do the same for them as well.

Of course we're not talking large sums of money either, $200 is ridiculous. I'm talking like $50 at the most and most of the time it's just paying for each others meals or something small like that.

I feel pretty mcuh the same way; I'm close enough with my inner circle that I wouldn't feel bad paying for meals or the odd thing here or there ecause I know they would WANT to pay me back. Otherwise, it's a messy situation, and it ends up leaving bed feelings.

[Will Gotti]

Nope fuck friends, they don't get any of my money. That's the best way to keep it and no one has to worry about shit. Reason is, I use to borrow/loan money from friends and everything would be fine until they would fuck me over taking my kindness for weakness.

I'm not shifting blame cause I can take responsibility for my own actions, but the falling out always originated with them trying to get over on me. I'd let things slide when they didn't have the money. One guy when I was in the army was a straight up bitch. I owed him $40 and gave him $39 in various bills and $1 in quarters cause I didn't have a extra dollar. I was just trying to pay him back. The motherfucker refused to take the money until I got him a "real" dollar. This is the same motherfucker who still owed me $50 but his "fiancee" ditched him and he had an apartment off base that I told him not to get. I knew she was playing him and he didn't want to listen. He was stuck with the place for a good 6 months and I knew he was having a hard time with money. When I asked for my 50 he acted like he paid me back, but you could see the lying guilt in his eyes.

One of my friends from college, a straight up african nigga, is notorious for being so willing to "help" out friends with money, but doesn't like to pay his debts in full. It's almost like gets pleasure from being a loanshark so he can annoy the fuck out of you when it's time to pay him back. He'll always be $5 short, joke and avoid the question thinking you'll lay off and stuff like that but he'll want his full money back. Fuck that, gimme my money nigga. Whenever money comes up, I cuss him out to his face and he looks at me like I'm crazy. He knows not to be short on money around me cause of his indiscretions, he knows I don't play and I'll leave his ass standing there empty handed in a heartbeat so he comes prepared. I've had enough of his shit.

So from now on and always, fuck all friends, get a job. We're friends but don't ask me for money.

[guado]

well it really comes down to what you consider a friend, a FRIEND would pay you back no matter how much the amount is because they respect you and care for you enough to do so, if they abuse your kindness then they in all honesty aren't your friend

im usually a generous person, and still am but i've been got a bunch of times because of it and i really had to stop and consider who my friends were and who were just my acquaintances

if i can't trust a person wit something important than i don't consider them my friend, i might loan an acquaintance somethin small like 10 dollars max but i wouldn't be expecting to get it back

if my friend was in need of somethin i would give it to him, and if he wanted to borrow some money on some bullshit like a game or something and i said know he would understand and not get all bitchy, because we are friends

people need to reallly evaluate who they let be around them

[Will Gotti]

Thanks for the kind words of advise, but that's a utopian version of a friend. People are gonna be people and shit happens. I have had good friends who would pay back money owed. Bottom line is at this point in my life, NOBODY ask me for money cause if you press me after I say no and call me a jew, blah, blah, you'll wish you just never asked at all.

Money is money and it can influence/run people, even your bestest friend and all that you've trusted since preschool. I trust NO ONE fully, my trust comes with the situation and my evaluation of the person and whatever I deem suitable. I don't even trust myself all the time. Meaning if I can't keep small promises to myself, which we all at some point break, how can you fully trust someone else? You can evaluate the people you hang around the rest of your life, but everyone has some sort of deviousness about them, yin and yang. Money is earned and so is trust.

I'm just tired of the bullshit. It'll be a rare opportunity that you'll get money out of me. I might drop a few bucks out of kindness. If you're a friend and you're truly in a jam and whatever situation you find yourself in and you need my help, then I'll help. Otherwise just random loans of $20, 30, 50, 200. Get the fuck away from me.

[Slide]

I agree with Will Gotti, but i still voted yes in the Poll.

It's pretty much like this, you can trust friends with money when you know they don't even really need it. It's funny like that.

It works, cause you pretty much know that they got your back on another time or thing in the same situation.
So you can loan money to friends where they don't have their wallet on them at the time, or like they just happen to be short money by surprise when trying to buy something etc.

You know the phrase "I know you're good for it."
That sums the first part up nicely.

Whereas, when someone is in a big financial rut and they need some money from you, chances are they WONT pay you back. Simply because, if they're in a financial rut, it's pretty obvious that they dont know how to handle money all too well. Being in the hole proves that they can't handle their shit, so it's like a resume proving that theyre also unable to pay you back. Probably because they owe others on top of that. At that point, KNOWING that you wont get your money back, sometimes it can pretty much just ride on how you value so and so's friendship. Like the money aint really a thing.

Then you turn your back to them like Pauly from Goodfellas, turning down all favors from then on. j/k :rofl:

EDIT: So pretty much what I'm tryin to say is: Trust is not unconditional

[Will Gotti]

We pretty much agree on this subject because you explained some stuff that I agree with as well Slide. I'm not a jew about money and can have spurts of kindness, but it's like I don't work for money to help friends out all the time. If they forget their wallet or are short on a little money then yea, it's a different story cause I'd like the favor returned. Like I said shit happens and that's in all types of situations so I try to assess each differently.

One of my roommates was short $200 on his rent last month. He knew not to let me hear about that or ask me for help because he'd hassle me about rent cause I REFUSE to write checks, I told my banks I don't want checks, and he wants me to do stuff his way. He wants everyone to do stuff his way. I found out he was short from one of my roommates cause they know I would go off on him for being a bitch to himself and I (he handles the rent) and tear into him cause I've never been short. It's ok for him to be late on his half but he gets on the rest of us. Anyways I'm always good for rent and bills, but he talks shit about me going to the ATM to get the money. Who the fuck cares how I get you the money, you're getting aren't you? Shit. My bank Washington Mutual temporarly blocked my checking account because of fraud prevention. I hadn't used my account up until I needed to get October 2006 rent money. I guess one day I was so drunk that I put in the wrong pin too many times and it got blocked. I went to get my rent money later and it showed I had a couple g's but it wouldn't dispense me any money saying I needed to contact my financial institution.

This motherfucker went off on the deep end even though I showed him that I had money in the account. He's just stupid. I cleared it up with my bank and got the money the next day. See shit like that is what royally pisses me off. He knows if he hadn't acted like an asshole to the one person who gives him hard cold cash or money orders without ANY way of it bouncing like a check, I probably would have spotted him the $200. Him realizing he's a bitch was a instant no no going to Will for help. Instead he asked my only other roommate who was kind enough to help him. I don't even ask for money from friends cause I don't want to hear the bullshit, insinuations, false accusations, etc. You do your business with your money, I do mine.

The only people who loan me money and I have agreements with is my mom and dad. They're the only two people in this world that I trust without even really thinking about it and they haven't failed me.

[versus addict]

sorry = paying people back

....otherwise, "sorry" doesn't mean jack shit.

[Spiderjericho]

Slide and Gotti,

I agree with the two of you.

Recently, I lent this girl I was talking to $150. Her god daugther's birthday was the next day, and she was opting not to attend, as she didn't have any money. Showing interest and compassion, I asked why not ask one of your friends? She was like ehhh.

So, my dumb ass, says, hey, I'll lend you the money. Mind you, I was in Japan and had to Western Union it to her (adding another $20). To this day (almost three months later), I have yet to see any money. I've heard her mention going to Universal Studios, giving her hair stylist a bonus for Christmas, yadda, yadda.

From this point on, I don't think I'll lend anyone more than $50, unless they're a REALLY close friend and I know they have a strong sense of honor.

[Slide]

We pretty much agree on this subject because you explained some stuff that I agree with as well Slide. I'm not a jew about money and can have spurts of kindness, but it's like I don't work for money to help friends out all the time. If they forget their wallet or are short on a little money then yea, it's a different story cause I'd like the favor returned. Like I said shit happens and that's in all types of situations so I try to assess each differently.

One of my roommates was short $200 on his rent last month. He knew not to let me hear about that or ask me for help because he'd hassle me about rent cause I REFUSE to write checks, I told my banks I don't want checks, and he wants me to do stuff his way. He wants everyone to do stuff his way. I found out he was short from one of my roommates cause they know I would go off on him for being a bitch to himself and I (he handles the rent) and tear into him cause I've never been short. It's ok for him to be late on his half but he gets on the rest of us. Anyways I'm always good for rent and bills, but he talks shit about me going to the ATM to get the money. Who the fuck cares how I get you the money, you're getting aren't you? Shit. My bank Washington Mutual temporarly blocked my checking account because of fraud prevention. I hadn't used my account up until I needed to get October 2006 rent money. I guess one day I was so drunk that I put in the wrong pin too many times and it got blocked. I went to get my rent money later and it showed I had a couple g's but it wouldn't dispense me any money saying I needed to contact my financial institution.

This motherfucker went off on the deep end even though I showed him that I had money in the account. He's just stupid. I cleared it up with my bank and got the money the next day. See shit like that is what royally pisses me off. He knows if he hadn't acted like an asshole to the one person who gives him hard cold cash or money orders without ANY way of it bouncing like a check, I probably would have spotted him the $200. Him realizing he's a bitch was a instant no no going to Will for help. Instead he asked my only other roommate who was kind enough to help him. I don't even ask for money from friends cause I don't want to hear the bullshit, insinuations, false accusations, etc. You do your business with your money, I do mine.

The only people who loan me money and I have agreements with is my mom and dad. They're the only two people in this world that I trust without even really thinking about it and they haven't failed me.

Yeah I got my random acts of kindness too when it comes to that. Usually it's with Alcohol or Food. Cause I mean there's been plenty of times where I've been trying to save up, but I get dragged out and my friends spot me on drinks. Money usually should never come into the picture IMO, and when and if it does it should just be seamless like you letting them borrow a DVD or something. When it makes you pause a sec, and think about it, then that's when it's probably not going to go or end well for someone. For various reasons.

Like it should flow like "hey im gonna order some pizza" "oh aight cool, i got this one this time you get the next one" // "yo man let's order some chinese, i got it's cool, cause you had the pizza last time"

Pretty much though I kinda feel like, I dont have a problem at all lending money to someone that's as business minded as I am. Cause then you don't even have to 2nd guess or mute the conversation point of how so and so, or you, are going to pay back the deed. It just fits into the conversation seamlessly. And i'm mainly talking about points of food and alcohol.

"Hey i dont have cash on me, just my card. So you pay for the cab to and from, and getting into the club, we then use my tab for a few drinks" So then your friend sees that the tab went passed the amount of cab fee and entrance fee, so when you guys hit up taco bell or some shit on way to so and so female's(and friends) crib, they got you on the t-bell no questions asked. THEY JUST DO IT. It's not even discussed.

Now I had a friend from college, that got into a financial rut. I came to visit when I was on leave in the Army, and he was telling me about it how he's struggling with finances. I mean i understood and everything, cause in his major it's indeed a struggle with all the stuff he has to put money into and all that. So I offered to help him out with $300. Now this is the situation where I valued the friendship more than $300 so i didnt even care to ask for him to pay me back. Thing is... he said himself that he would pay me back. <-that's the trigger. He never did. It's been 2 years. So mean no big deal right? Cause i didnt expect him to pay me back in the first place. NO. Cause he SAID he was going to pay me back, so i took his word for it, and he didnt follow through on that word. Now I don't consider him a friend like that anymore. It's a fuckin shame really.

And yeah I don't like to, and avoid as much as possible, on asking to borrow money from someone else. Mainly cause I dont get into financial trouble, I avoid it altogether. That's one of the reasons why im in the army saving up. Cause yep, you gotta hear the bullshit follow ups. I only ask to borrow money if it's a dollar to get something out of a soda machine. Meaning I only ask money in situations someone would hand it out to a total stranger without a problem. Too easy.

Slide and Gotti,

I agree with the two of you.

Recently, I lent this girl I was talking to $150. Her god daugther's birthday was the next day, and she was opting not to attend, as she didn't have any money. Showing interest and compassion, I asked why not ask one of your friends? She was like ehhh.

So, my dumb ass, says, hey, I'll lend you the money. Mind you, I was in Japan and had to Western Union it to her (adding another $20). To this day (almost three months later), I have yet to see any money. I've heard her mention going to Universal Studios, giving her hair stylist a bonus for Christmas, yadda, yadda.

From this point on, I don't think I'll lend anyone more than $50, unless they're a REALLY close friend and I know they have a strong sense of honor.

Thing is, she never said anything about paying you back.

That wasnt very good on your part.

It's funny how, if you expect to not get your money back it's not a big deal. If you expect to get your money back and you do, it's not a big deal.

It's ALWAYS bad when it's something you don't expect.
Different expectations trample trust. She never gave you her word or anything like that did she? You just expected her to.

[gouki10]

when it comes to giving money to friends, don't expect anything back. thats the best way to look at it, no matter how much the amount is, however if they use you for money, then thats a different story.

[Will Gotti]

The other thing is I give people a good 5 days starting from the due date to pay me back. I've lost one friendship because of money, that sumbitch from the army in one of my previous posts, and the african dude and one of my roommates don't even speak about borrowing/loaning money around me really.

It shouldn't be that way, but some people don't know how to talk/approach certain subjects correctly, in this case money. I'm no professional, but there's always a right and wrong way to talk to different people. You can't approach everybody the same.

Like my roommate will say "So what's up with your rent money?" and he'll have his head cocked up and look all serious like I don't have it. I'll just say what's up with yours? You can't be late and expect us not to get annoyed or mad. He'll just say "Look man..." and go off on some stupid bullshit and give a due date as if I don't know when rent is due and I'll tell him he better have his. The only reason why he started acting like this is because after graduation in September I didn't work until November so I was in transition hell looking for work after college and was a film major where work doesn't just drop in you lap once you walk across the stage. Only a small percent like 2% if that will be lucky enough to get instant work. My parents spotted me, good looking out, and everything was cool. He just likes to hang onto the one time I was a day late but was waiting for the money to come in the mail. Fucking ignorant cause the landlord knows I'm always good and what's funny is she even asked him if he wanted her to spot him the $200 he was short. WTF? I would never come to a point where the landlord thinks it's ok to spot me. That's like having a landlord and loanshark rolled up into one jewish lady (she really is jewish).

I get the Infamous UTA List (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_Talent_Agency) up the ass from my academic advisor and it's hard to get noticed. He doesn't get any hardly like me.

Now I work more than him freelance, get film shoots where I'm making random fat cash. If I was always late or short I could see people getting pissed, but the other guys are like wtf man Will always gives you fucking cash or money orders what's your problem? I think it's jealousy and he won't deny it. It's like how is this black guy getting all this and I'm not (he's mexican). He always says I'm lucky, everyone I know does. He just wants to get ahead before I do and I'm not really trying all the time. People just like my personality. We've been friends and off and on again roommates for over 3 years. When his last roommates wanted to move away from him I was like you were my first roommate out here and I consider you a friend, so I wanted to move to LA a year before graduation and invited him along. He would have had a $1500/month rent at his last place by his damn self and I came to the rescue. He was grateful, but thinks he can talk shit like I'm not legit with the rent. Was is the key word. It's amazing.

He can't fuck me and lie really cause $487 being spent on something else and then you lying about it will find my knuckles around his fat head. If the landlord doesn't get her money, we know to go to him. It's like motherfucker 4 out of 6 of us work at the same place/gigs and just got paid. I made $200 more on the side than you this past week and you're gonna ask me about rent like that? It's ridiculous. This is what I'm talking about money influencing/running people.

[funkymusic]

Money is really the only thing ive lost friends over. So id say leave em seperate.

[MvC2fanatic]

damn, how much did duc get from you guys?


adam losing a G is some mad money.

[Spiderjericho]

Thing is, she never said anything about paying you back.

That wasnt very good on your part.

It's funny how, if you expect to not get your money back it's not a big deal. If you expect to get your money back and you do, it's not a big deal.

It's ALWAYS bad when it's something you don't expect.
Different expectations trample trust. She never gave you her word or anything like that did she? You just expected her to.

Umm...I might have left that part out, which is my bad. But she said, she was going to pay me within a certain time period. She didn't. And I mentioned it to her probably two or three times.

[Airthrow]

^and she said what?

I would never lend a female money unless she begged me and I wanted to continue fucking her. Boys are raised from childhood to grow up with a sense of honor and "being a man" which has no equivelent for schemeing ass females. So they don't even feel bad at all about straight ripping you off.

[Higher-Jin]

Not unless they are very close friends and even then they will take their sweet time paying you back.

My loans usually come in the form of paying for someone's lunch or covering someone if they are a few dollars short on something they really want (just not all the time).

The thing about loaning to a friend in a strict ammount is that you can't really enforce any rules or due dates effectively. If you press too hard you may hurt the friendship, and if you're too easy going then you may never see that money again.

My advice would probably be to get collateral when it comes to the 60-200 dollar loan ball park. Boombox, playstation, rare copy of a video game, something really important you know they'll want back. Everytime they'll want to use it they'll remember they owe you the money. If they buy another one you can confront them about it and they'll be the bad guy for trying to douche out of paying you back, but most importantly.... you at least get a consolation prize if they douche out on you.

The whole written document thing won't work because really what are you going to do with that? Take them to court? Yea that'll strenghten your friendship, fighting over a hamilton on judge fricking judy. Look out for your friends, but if you know they may flake on you then protect your neck.

edit: If they ask you something along the lines of "Why don't you trust them by asking for collateral" then switch it back to them and ask what difference will it make if they plan to pay you back on their next pay check or soon or whatever.

[Spiderjericho]

^and she said what?

I would never lend a female money unless she begged me and I wanted to continue fucking her. Boys are raised from childhood to grow up with a sense of honor and "being a man" which has no equivelent for schemeing ass females. So they don't even feel bad at all about straight ripping you off.

She said she would pay it back. Now, maybe I was raised different, but when someone tells you they'll pay you back, then they're word is bond. Like Tony Montana said, "All I have in this world is my nuts and my word, and I don't break them for nobody..."

If she was a he, then I would've probably gotten a lot more confrontational. And the thing that bugs me is we'll be in a conversation and she'll say in passing something she did, which required money but wasn't a necessity.

Between her and another person who a group of us bailed out of jail, I've decided that one of my New Year's Resolutions is to not lend out any money, unless it's absolutely important. And if I do, it will be no more than $40 (as that is an amount of money I can afford to lose).

[Airthrow]

That's what I'm saying, you can't get as confrontational with a woman as you can with a man about paying you back, that is, if you were raised to be a gentleman and treat women a certain way (as I was). I think most of them know this and take advantage of it, or just flat out don't care about honoring their word.

Never lend to women unless you're getting something out of it.

[WISHKA]

well what if u challnge ur friend to a sf match and u bet money on it

[DropKick Murphy]

She said she would pay it back. Now, maybe I was raised different, but when someone tells you they'll pay you back, then they're word is bond. Like Tony Montana said, "All I have in this world is my nuts and my word, and I don't break them for nobody..."

If she was a he, then I would've probably gotten a lot more confrontational. And the thing that bugs me is we'll be in a conversation and she'll say in passing something she did, which required money but wasn't a necessity.

Between her and another person who a group of us bailed out of jail, I've decided that one of my New Year's Resolutions is to not lend out any money, unless it's absolutely important. And if I do, it will be no more than $40 (as that is an amount of money I can afford to lose).

Sounds Like you fucked up.

[Spiderjericho]

^^^To sum up the lesson:

YUP!!

[soup or man]

When Ricky stiffed the cannons everybody jumped on his shit and tried to blackball him

...

who wouldn't stiff the cannons. fine lookin' gentlemen.

[TS]

Come on. Make the comment about the blackballing. You know you want to.


(Stuff.)
Where have you been?

[pherai]

I think everyone has the attitude that its ok to lend friends money until they do it and realize even your close friends wont pay you back. A lot of you would be suprised how cheap your friends can be when trying to get them to pay you back. You may feel like a jerk saying no to your friends, but I'd rather feel like a jerk and have my money, than be pissed at my friend and be down $50.

[Ouroborus]

anything over $20 is a definite no.

what am i? a bank?

[Airthrow]

Come on. Make the comment about the blackballing. You know you want to.



Where have you been?

Internetless for a long time, you wouldn't believe the drama...whatup?

[TS]

I think you owe it to yourself to check the 2006 Nominations thread, and the subsequent threads spawned by it:

http://forums.shoryuken.com/showthread.php?t=121846

The Mycah thread has a slow build, but...good lord.

[Airthrow]

Oh yeah I cought the Mycah thread and wanted to save it after I got my connection back, it was just CLASSIC.

[Captain Ryu]

Depends on the friend. I have some friends I'd lone money to without a question and some I wont. It also depends on the situation.

[Hwoarvang]

Yeap, it's always the type of friend you have. I only lend out to the brotherly-family friends, one who knows the responsibility of a good friendship and that appreciates the friendship.

I've borrowed out some of my stuff to friends and it was just about as good as lending out money. I got my games back all scractched and some weren't even returned, even after I told them to be careful with it. Those bastages!

[GalzPanic]

Sometimes I lend to friends with no payback date because I know they're good for it and would do the same. But most of the time fuck tha.t

[ADarkSilhouette]

I am also a victim of my kindness, once loaned my "friend" 60$ with my mentality set to if he is truly my friend he will pay me back. Well needless to say it has been about 8 or 9 months since then and still no word from him. Oh well im not mad about it since its only fucking money, it comes but goes just as quickly but ya it does make you think and doubt everything you believe in since now a days trust is pretty much a long forgotten thing.

My 2 cents... Like its been said before, KNOW who your lending money to and then ask yourself at least a dozen times(can I trust this person to pay me back without me having to hound his/her bitch ass about it).

[HeartNana]

Depends on the friend. My absolute closest friends i'll lend to without expecting back, if i get it back, thats cool, but otherwise i understand how things are cause everyone covers everyone.

With people i would consider myself "friends" with, i'll loan and expect it back. Depends on the situation though.

With those i consider myself "acquaintances" with, if they ask for a buck or two for help with lunch or something, and i dont know them too well, i'll usually say yes just to be nice but ill definitely not expect anything back.

So only dispensable friends are the "loan and expect back" category.

[hold dat]

i'll repeat this also : it depends on the friend

A friend of mine leant me $2700 in April. I had a problem with a hospital charging me for treatment they mistakenly put on my bill. i went there for a sprain they hit me with x-ray charges and other kind of shit.vAny way they froze my account and garnished my paychecks for 100% After telling my boys about it he offered to pay.

1. Cause money was never an issue with us. we would treat each other evrytime one of us had the money. If he drove, i paid the gas, and vice versa

2. he knew me. and he knew where i worked and lived. if i tried somethin funny. he'd fuck me up or get me fucked up. lol

3. I have a steady income so he knew i had the MEANS to pay him back

so remeber you'll always have a lot of associates but few friends.

Only borrow if you truly believe you can pay your debt

don't make it a habit...and that goes for lending and borrowing

This was the first time i ever borrowed more than $20 from someone. it still hurts my pride a little. if i had it...i'd do the same for him in a heartbeat

[Biolink]

Me and my friends are cool for the most part with money.If it's money for food,get home money,or if they are a couple dollars short when they want to buy a new pair of shoes or something,I usually just give them the money and say that they don't even have to pay me back because I know that they have my back if I ever need anything.

I rarely ask to borrow anything,so I rarely have any problems at all.

I do have weed-head friends,but I try not to fuck with them anymore,since they are just going to blow my money on something insignificant anyway.