The Depression thread

[Reveal]

Hey guys.
I know a friend of mine that is depressed (she's an ex GF actually and there's a lot more to the story but I won't get into that for now.) I want to try and help her whenever possible, like be there for her, be able to say that magical sentence that will make things better. But sadly, it's not like that. I'm not depressed so I can't really relate to her on that level I guess, which just makes me feel like crap. I want to be that guy that she can depend on and count on to make her atleast feel better when she's down. I've actually looked up stuff about depression but none of the advice on these sites never seem to work. I come to SRK for help, if anyone has been in this situation, or anyone who IS depressed that posts on these forums, if you could give some feedback or advice, that would be awesome. Related stories are great too. Thanks for the help!

[sixtymhz]

Down the railroad tracks, not across.

[Demon Dash]

There's nothing you can do really... Depression's one of those things that takes time and time only... By the sounds of things you're trying to play the hero, which you shouldn't do. Simply being her friend and trying to keep her mind off things will do more good, this is her journey, not yours...

[AzN_Skater]

If it's clinical depression, than she needs meds. It won't "cure" her, but it'll help with the process. If it's NOT clinical (undiagnosed), than tell her to find a hobby or something. People confused sadness for depression all the time, gotta make sure she has what she says she has.

[Satomiblood]

She needs psychotherapy. And medication. Depression isn't something you can will yourself out of overnight. This also depends on what type of depression she's feeling (i.e. clinical or not). Best bet is to see her doctor and have them recommend a diagnostic session with a therapist. This will determine what she has. Maybe she just needs a hobby or change of scenery.

[ShinAkumax]

meh... I over came depression, there is nothing you can do. You can only help those that want to be helped. More often than not, depression is a choice, not an affliction.

Specially you, you can't help her. You are her ex, that's just not how it works. Just send her this song, have a coke and a smile.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=eBGIQ7ZuuiU

[#reload]

By the sounds of things you're trying to play the hero, which you shouldn't do. Simply being her friend and trying to keep her mind off things will do more good, this is her journey, not yours...

too true, i've messed up friendships because of this

[FragMasterGen]

try growing some balls

[Return of Shiki]

Clinical depression can't be "cured". It isn't a "temporary" thing, either--it's chronic.
It's something you have to live with everyday.
Many people are so ignorant of this...they think depression is just a "phase" or they equate it to having "the blues". People even misdiagnose themselves as "depressed" when really they're just sad because of some circumstance.

I don't know what category your friend falls into...even with chronic depression there are many levels. Mild depression is usually treatable by a cocktail of meds prescribed by a drug-pushing psychiatrist. People with major clinical depression, like me, well...that's something you have to deal with your whole life.

[diifii]

im very depressed most of the time. most people dont know this because i never show it.
but i am.

and this is what helps me the most. having people around me that talk to me and are nice to me. knowing that there are people out there that care about me is the best way to get out of depression IMO.

its great that you are there for her. i think this is very important. show her that you care about her. do fun things together.

[Return of Shiki]

im very depressed most of the time. most people dont know this because i never show it.
but i am.


Most people who are severely depressed behave exactly like this. They go so far into putting an external face of jovialness or congeniality to mask their internal depression.

Look at professional comedians--most of them are some of the most depressed celebrities in show business.

[SRKev]

Clinical depression can't be "cured". It isn't a "temporary" thing, either--it's chronic.
It's something you have to live with everyday.
Many people are so ignorant of this...they think depression is just a "phase" or they equate it to having "the blues". People even misdiagnose themselves as "depressed" when really they're just sad because of some circumstance.

I don't know what category your friend falls into...even with chronic depression there are many levels. Mild depression is usually treatable by a cocktail of meds prescribed by a drug-pushing psychiatrist. People with major clinical depression, like me, well...that's something you have to deal with your whole life.

Along with this, I'd like to say.

Don't try to be Captain Save-a-Hoe.

I'm sure she's your ex for a good reason, so point her in the direction of a doctor and GTFO.

[diifii]

just please dont tell her she needs a doctor. that will make it all seem like a much bigger problem. which then may turn it into a bigger problem. she may go as far as cutting herself.

ok look i was very depressed at this one point. it lasted for about a year. now im getting much better. im learning to deal with it. and im telling you again. depressed people need friends that care about them and that are nice to them. depressed people like to shut them self away from everybody many times. but they really do need somebody that will be close to them. somebody they will get along with.

this works for me. and i hope this will work for her.
so not a doctor which will cost tons of cash and time. but a close and good friend.

[dbostick]

Weed. Cures everything...

[DaDesiCanadian]

In before crawling.

[LimeGreenPatato]

Tell her to deal with it or just end it cause she's a pain in the ass and you don't have time to deal with her shit.

[Bob Poundmax]

Hey guys.
I know a friend of mine that is depressed (she's an ex GF actually and there's a lot more to the story but I won't get into that for now.) I want to try and help her whenever possible, like be there for her, be able to say that magical sentence that will make things better. But sadly, it's not like that. I'm not depressed so I can't really relate to her on that level I guess, which just makes me feel like crap. I want to be that guy that she can depend on and count on to make her atleast feel better when she's down. I've actually looked up stuff about depression but none of the advice on these sites never seem to work. I come to SRK for help, if anyone has been in this situation, or anyone who IS depressed that posts on these forums, if you could give some feedback or advice, that would be awesome. Related stories are great too. Thanks for the help!

All you can really do is give moral support. Dont try to answer everything just stick around and show her someone cares.

[Reveal]

To the people giving real advice and help, thanks a lot. I appreciate it. Yeah, a couple years ago when we were together I'd mention doctors and meds and shit. Those conversations never went anywhere. She's so against taking meds and I've pretty much realized that if she's ever going to take them, it's gonna be her choice.
So I stay away from that topic at all costs now; it just upsets her.
She said she's been feeling real moody and anti-social lately, I guess for like the past month or so. Probably due to her job, where she works a night shift. I was thinking maybe showing up at her work when she gets off, despite her saying she's been anti-social and all lately? Would it help if I showed up or should I just back off?

And also if you guys have any stories to share that'd be pretty awesome.

[orka]

try growing some balls

yea man!

just hormone therapy dat shit. once she grows a dick, you two can cockslap depression out of each other's faces.

powah of science!! :tup:

[Darkside3024]

meh... I over came depression, there is nothing you can do. You can only help those that want to be helped. More often than not, depression is a choice, not an affliction.

Specially you, you can't help her. You are her ex, that's just not how it works. Just send her this song, have a coke and a smile.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=eBGIQ7ZuuiU

:rofl: I can't believe I fell for that.

[goodm0urning]

If you're her friend, then be there when she needs you, and listen instead of talking. It's ultimately up to her to soldier through it, but giving her a safety net couldn't hurt.

If you're her ex, you're probably not the best person for this job.

[Dasrik]

bunch of nonsense where you act like you totally don't want to sex this girl
I DON'T BELIEVE YOU! (http://idontbelieveyou.ytmnd.com)

[Lantis]

HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN TO MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE?!


For all you EMO Kanucks. :tup:

[rsigley]

i had a depressed girlfriend once and she called me up and was cutting herself over the phone

and i was like damn why can't you turn me on like you are now

and i told her i could be at her house in 15 mins and she could resume cutting then

but then she told me she was just lying :(