Does this look like a doctor's note?

[Scumbaaaaahg]

I really have no idea what a doctors note actually looks like so I'm not sure.

A friend of mine called in sick for work and said he was in the hospital with food poisioning. Horrible lie in the first place. You can tell right away he's not really smart or creative.

His manager asks for a doctors note and he comes up with this.

http://img17.imageshack.us/img17/7222/docnote.jpg

So I ask you srk, is this even close to a doctors note?

I'm not going to tell him that theres no chance in hell he'll successfully bullshit the actual writing on the note.

[Grits'N'Gravy]

He should ask Fark or SomethingAwful.com for this.

What a fuckin idiot.

You don't take a day off for no reason when they economy is deeper in the sewer than Splinter and the turtles.

[TheSix]

That looks bootleg as fuck.

[Madden:RobotBMX2K9]

you're friend really didn't think this through.

food poisoning? wtf

[Hazank0]

you have better chances of connecting claws ultra than passing that off as a doctor's note

[deadfrog]

Scumbag, it is youuuuu!!!!

[Scumbaaaaahg]

Here is the template for his 2nd attempt.

http://x2f.xanga.com/808d361175d30104050576/z73489466.jpg

He says hes gonna "spruce it up" :lol:


Scumbag, it is youuuuu!!!!


No, its not me. I don't even have a job.

[natural_ice]

"a word of the doctor" :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[TheSix]

It would be funny if they just call that mothafucka (the doctor).

[Kzoh]

I went to school with a dude who brought a bootleg doctors note to school ,he bought it on ebay. :rofl: I think he pulled it off, never got caught, but this shit looks fake.

[natural_ice]

Here is the template for his 2nd attempt.

http://x2f.xanga.com/808d361175d30104050576/z73489466.jpg

He says hes gonna "spruce it up" :lol:




No, its not me. I don't even have a job.

lol wtf 1 day turned into 2 weeks off?

[Scumbaaaaahg]

lol wtf 1 day turned into 2 weeks off?

I think spruce it up meant to change the writing to reflect his situation. Like I said, he just wants the template.

I told him he was retarded and to not be a pussy. Just show up at work with another excuse as to why he doesnt have it. They forget about it after that usually, especially if you're a decent employee.

[Higher-Jin]

Your friend is an idiot. All he has to do is call in early on the day he wants off (preferably a few hours before his shift) and say he is throwing up. If the manager asks for a doctor note he can just say he didn't go to one. He took some peptobismal, went to sleep, felt better the next day. If the boss doesn't believe you at first just hold your ground and he'll at least think it's possible. His elaborate web of lies is wholly unnecessary and stupid. Lies should always be simple because it's harder for people to poke holes in your story and it's harder for you to contradict yourself that way, as well.

edit: 2 weeks? What the hell does he need with 2 weeks off?

[ibow2no1]

Umm.. If you just set up a real doctors appointment and say something like " i wasn't feeling well, so i took off a day a work and now i need a doctors excuse." They usually give you one.

[wez]

This is a doctor's note (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VSUk6-onr8E&feature=related). (start at 4:26)

[majeh]

wow that 2nd attempt is legit. good luck on not getting fired to your friend..

[koogy]

good luck printing out that shit at that low of a resolution

basically you are fucked if the manager has half a brain

[SIMPLY_HUGO]

That looks bootleg as fuck.

I heard dat.. shit is weak

[Aria]

He should just upfront tell him that he needs to take a day off. If he refused, well, he's gotta live with it or try another time, when his boss is in a better mood.

[BudaFuka]

Why the fuck did he say he went to the hospital. He should've told him he stayed home, and he'd bring his shit stained clothing in the next day.

Edit: :rofl::rofl::rofl: 2 weeks for food poisoning, I hope your friend gets fired.

[WARNA BROTHER]

You should tell him that the 1st one is legit and to go with it...



Then go into his job on the day after he gets fired with a resume.

[natural_ice]

lol the guy is just using the template for the note not the actual content in the letter. i hope he makes it man i . pulled a stunt like this once where i gave myself pink eye with a bottle of cologne. that worked tho. i recommend

[Crayz Penguin]

hes done. anytime anyone says they have food poisoning its automatically assumed that they're hungover.

[thurst]

Your friend is an idiot. All he has to do is call in early on the day he wants off (preferably a few hours before his shift) and say he is throwing up. If the manager asks for a doctor note he can just say he didn't go to one. He took some peptobismal, went to sleep, felt better the next day. If the boss doesn't believe you at first just hold your ground and he'll at least think it's possible. His elaborate web of lies is wholly unnecessary and stupid. Lies should always be simple because it's harder for people to poke holes in your story and it's harder for you to contradict yourself that way, as well.

this. most docs/nurses will give you a note at the drop of a hat whether you need it or not.

[DoctaMario]

You should tell him that the 1st one is legit and to go with it...



Then go into his job on the day after he gets fired with a resume.

:rofl:

The whole "you need a doctor's note" thing is bullshit. The last restaurant I worked at, I had the flu and couldn't come in (they wanted me to SERVE FOOD with the FLU! O_o ) and they told me I needed a doctor's note. I said I couldn't afford a doctor and they let it slide. If you have a good reason as to why you're out, and you're a decent employee, you'll be fine even if you're faking. But people come up with the worst excuses these days and don't even think before they lie. :rolleyes:

On the real though, that second template looks good but as has been said, that low res shit won't cut it if his boss has half a brain in his head.

Your friend's gonna get fiiiiaaaaahhd, your friend's gonna get fiiiiaaahhhhhd! :lol:

[noontide]

this can't end well.

[Scumbaaaaahg]

:rofl:

The whole "you need a doctor's note" thing is bullshit. The last restaurant I worked at, I had the flu and couldn't come in (they wanted me to SERVE FOOD with the FLU! O_o ) and they told me I needed a doctor's note. I said I couldn't afford a doctor and they let it slide. If you have a good reason as to why you're out, and you're a decent employee, you'll be fine even if you're faking. But people come up with the worst excuses these days and don't even think before they lie. :rolleyes:

On the real though, that second template looks good but as has been said, that low res shit won't cut it if his boss has half a brain in his head.

Your friend's gonna get fiiiiaaaaahhd, your friend's gonna get fiiiiaaahhhhhd! :lol:

Heh yea, you just served food. He works as a line cook for a chain restaurant :lol:

So yea, I told him about this thread and quoted some replies. He got all pissed and blocked me on msn :lol:

He even changed his facebook status to "ugh I'm so sick!!"

[Aria]

So yea, I told him about this thread and quoted some replies. He got all pissed and blocked me on msn :lol:

:rofl: Some friend that guy is.

[elitericerocket]

this. most docs/nurses will give you a note at the drop of a hat whether you need it or not.

Truth. I remember getting offered doctor's notes during the summer when I didn't even need them.

[TheWanderer]

I really have no idea what a doctors note actually looks like so I'm not sure.

A friend of mine called in sick for work and said he was in the hospital with food poisioning. Horrible lie in the first place. You can tell right away he's not really smart or creative.

His manager asks for a doctors note and he comes up with this.

http://img17.imageshack.us/img17/7222/docnote.jpg

So I ask you srk, is this even close to a doctors note?

I'm not going to tell him that theres no chance in hell he'll successfully bullshit the actual writing on the note.ima try n see what i can do here, cuz i love this kind of shit. its like im born to be bad or some shit. i didnt get in trouble when i woke up 6 hours late for work.


anyway.

-tell your friend to stay cool and LOOK LOOK LOOK at his boss eyes. dont look down or away, then his boss will know.

-look fuck up when going in the office.. that mean your voice and posture look like an old granny.. practice.

i'll add more when i come up with some..

BUT BUT..if his boss decide to call the doctor or look the building up since he wont be able to reach the doctor.. he got himself a problem..this a toughass situation since youe friend is terrible liar god dam..

if its not too late, change the note or FUCK do something to make himself sick n then g to the doctor.. the date aint gonna do it but tell him to ask the front desk another copy of the note but blank..

[Riot Guard]

That note is perfect. "a word of the doctor" is pretty much official. As long as the first sentence mentions Dr. then you're good. Also, great idea with the logo and whatnot. I would have used Mercy hospital but that's just me.

And LOL at you people from trying to dissuade him for using that note. You want his friend to get fired?

[CarpeNoctumXIII]

Hmm, I called out today and all I said was "I'm not feeling too good this morning, I'm taking a sick day", and all is fine and dandy. Thank god for sick days. Your friend is way too over the top.

[Biggzy]

ima try n see what i can do here, cuz i love this kind of shit. its like im born to be bad or some shit. i didnt get in trouble when i woke up 6 hours late for work.


anyway.

-tell your friend to stay cool and LOOK LOOK LOOK at his boss eyes. dont look down or away, then his boss will know.

-look fuck up when going in the office.. that mean your voice and posture look like an old granny.. practice.

i'll add more when i come up with some..

BUT BUT..if his boss decide to call the doctor or look the building up since he wont be able to reach the doctor.. he got himself a problem..this a toughass situation since youe friend is terrible liar god dam..

if its not too late, change the note or FUCK do something to make himself sick n then g to the doctor.. the date aint gonna do it but tell him to ask the front desk another copy of the note but blank..

Wow best advice ever on SRK. His friend definitely won't get fired now.

Negged.

[HeartNana]

The best option right now is to give yourself food poisoning. Eat some expired yogurt or something.

Biggzy - Why the hate? TheWanderer is my favorite srk poster EVER! repped!

[Biggzy]

The best option right now is to give yourself food poisoning. Eat some expired yogurt or something.

Biggzy - Why the hate? TheWanderer is my favorite srk poster EVER! repped!

Lol. The LOOK LOOK LOOK into your boss' eyes was pretty funny. Though I think he was trying to be serious.

[Aria]

-tell your friend to stay cool and LOOK LOOK LOOK at his boss eyes. dont look down or away, then his boss will know.

-look fuck up when going in the office.. that mean your voice and posture look like an old granny.. practice.

i'll add more when i come up with some..

BUT BUT..if his boss decide to call the doctor or look the building up since he wont be able to reach the doctor.. he got himself a problem..this a toughass situation since youe friend is terrible liar god dam..

if its not too late, change the note or FUCK do something to make himself sick n then g to the doctor.. the date aint gonna do it but tell him to ask the front desk another copy of the note but blank..

:rofl: Oh god, I'm dyin' of laughter here.

[Darkstalker]

You should tell him that the 1st one is legit and to go with it...



Then go into his job on the day after he gets fired with a resume.

This is exactly what I thought of when I saw that he didn't have a job.

High five.

[PREFLEX]

http://www.alibinetwork.com/qanda.jsp

shoulda got on that alibi network

[Grog]

It'd most likely be on one of these. Just pick which you like, click the picture, click on the tab at the bottom that says downloads, enjoy.

https://shop.briggscorp.com/e2wItemQuickSearch.aspx?searchText=doctor+note

[TheWanderer]

man. ya'll just hating my ill skills.

EY OP keep me update about your boy..

[Pablo_the_Mex]

Why would need a doctor's note with these shitty jobs that probably don't even provide you with health insurance in the first place?

[DanSC]

this is interesting, i cant wait to see whats gonna happen to the guy..

[Jamerson]

Note looks legit. Alot more detail than ones I've written, too.

Ummm... anyone else notice that guy is complaining of food poisoning but gets a note for ethmoidectomy? Did he change his excuse all of a sudden?

[Satomiblood]

Truth. I remember getting offered doctor's notes during the summer when I didn't even need them.

A lot of times, they'll just have the receptionist do a quick signature on the office post-it note. No questions asked.

[elitericerocket]

A lot of times, they'll just have the receptionist do a quick signature on the office post-it note. No questions asked.

Yeah, I remember I was sick once when I worked at Best Buy. The nurse asked me what dates I wanted on my doctor's note. I went to the doctor on Friday but had her excuse me from work until Monday even though I was already starting to feel better.

[epikbeat]

So yea, I told him about this thread and quoted some replies. He got all pissed and blocked me on msn :lol:

In a way, you're helping him out, and he blocks you? Nice friend. What an idiot.

[Shinkuu Tatsumaki]

Your friend is a scumbag.

[Gouki7]

Here is the template for his 2nd attempt.

http://x2f.xanga.com/808d361175d30104050576/z73489466.jpg

He says hes gonna "spruce it up" :lol:




No, its not me. I don't even have a job.
Lmao, your friend is full of fail. I hope he turns that shit in. :rofl:

[bear]

I advise he get caught in the lie, since it's obvious, and then start stammering and looking around the room as to be sure of where the exits are. He should do a bad job of trying to save himself ("well, yeah, it's not a real Doctor's note, but my friend is in medical school and ... and he tried to ..."). Then start kind of crying/panicking, and rubbing his sweaty palms against his jeans, and finally admit to something really embarrassing. Some story that he wouldn't want to admit up front. I dunno what. He'd have to read the boss. But the kind of thing where you give way too much information and just make the boss uncomfortable. Something like ...

"I was cooking breakfast while naked and splashed hot grease on my penis. I was afraid it wouldn't work anymore, and I was too embarrassed to admit to this. I stayed at home all day freaked out I'd made myself impotent. It still hurts, but the cocoa butter is helping."

Then he could start to pull his pants down and say "Here, dude. I'll prove it", and the guy will likely say, "Whoa, whoa. No need. I understand why you didn't say anything. I'd prefer you tell the truth next time, but we'll let this slide. Just be careful, and maybe go see a doctor. For real this time." Then walk out of the room like a tip-toeing cowboy, sucking air through your teeth from time to time.

If you're gonna go elaborate, might as well go all the way.

[Carpet Lint]

-tell your friend to stay cool and LOOK LOOK LOOK at his boss eyes. dont look down or away, then his boss will know.
It's good that you repeated the word "LOOK" three times and wrote it in capital letters.

That way it's more clear and easier to understand.

I hope everyone took heed of this advice, it may yet serve you well in the future.

Remember, LOOK. Don't turn away!

[Satomiblood]

Walk, don't run. Drink juice, yum-yum.

[Monte]

damn you know you done fucked up when you're getting advice from TheWanderer. :rofl: