My Experience with Everclear

ZuluZulu ThrobJoined: Posts: 2,919 ✭✭✭
This past summer was the worst year of my life. I was in Tucson, Arizona and was just NOT happy. It was roaring hot, I was jobless, broke, and just depressed. For about 2 months, I turned to drugs (manily weed, oxy, and robitussin) because they took away the unhappiness. I was never an addict and I never felt like I could ever be one but I was just in a very unhappy place. But I realized that this is not me. So I moved to Los Angeles to live with my father and, despite me not having the greatest relationship with my father, things are on the up and up. :rock:

Anyway, one night, I was at a friends house getting high and listening to a lot of techno when he asked me if I had ever tried Everclear? I said no I hadn't because it is very hard to get (it's not sold in a few states). Arizona sells it and lo and behold, he had a full bottle of it.

After picking up the bottle, I noticed a few things. Namely the warning labels: HIGHLY FLAMMABLE and DO NOT CONSUME UNLESS MIXED WITH A NON-ALCOHOLIC BEVERAGE. This has more flammable warnings than a gas station.

So I knew I had to try it. But my friend was like, dude don't go crazy. This stuff can kill you. So, I went online to read more about this stuff and sure enough, all described the power and brute force of this drink. So I opened the bottle and nearly dropped it because the smell is overpowering. It's essentially gasoline. I poured a drop into a spoon to sample it and, I kid you not, EVAPORATED before it touched my tongue. So by this point, I'm interested greatly so I poured myself 4 (!) shot glasses full of this moonshine. And downed them. I had to swallow because the shit pretty much burned my tastebuds off. It was drinking the fires of hell. After doing 4, I needed to smoke but was afraid to on account that I might explode. It tastes what I imagine plutonium tastes like,

10 minutes later, I felt like I was melting. Everything felt like a chopped and screwed record. I've been drunk before but this is nuts. Never doing Everclear again. The only thing Everclear is good for is cleaning rust off of metal and clean a blocked drain. It's sole purpose is to be used for something industrial. Firebreathers use this stuff!
You're used to dealing with basic bitches. Basic shit. All the time.


Leave a Comment