My Experience with Everclear

ZuluZulu ThrobJoined: Posts: 2,832 ✭✭✭
This past summer was the worst year of my life. I was in Tucson, Arizona and was just NOT happy. It was roaring hot, I was jobless, broke, and just depressed. For about 2 months, I turned to drugs (manily weed, oxy, and robitussin) because they took away the unhappiness. I was never an addict and I never felt like I could ever be one but I was just in a very unhappy place. But I realized that this is not me. So I moved to Los Angeles to live with my father and, despite me not having the greatest relationship with my father, things are on the up and up. :rock:

Anyway, one night, I was at a friends house getting high and listening to a lot of techno when he asked me if I had ever tried Everclear? I said no I hadn't because it is very hard to get (it's not sold in a few states). Arizona sells it and lo and behold, he had a full bottle of it.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/d/d2/EverclearHiRes.jpg/300px-EverclearHiRes.jpg

After picking up the bottle, I noticed a few things. Namely the warning labels: HIGHLY FLAMMABLE and DO NOT CONSUME UNLESS MIXED WITH A NON-ALCOHOLIC BEVERAGE. This has more flammable warnings than a gas station.

So I knew I had to try it. But my friend was like, dude don't go crazy. This stuff can kill you. So, I went online to read more about this stuff and sure enough, all described the power and brute force of this drink. So I opened the bottle and nearly dropped it because the smell is overpowering. It's essentially gasoline. I poured a drop into a spoon to sample it and, I kid you not, EVAPORATED before it touched my tongue. So by this point, I'm interested greatly so I poured myself 4 (!) shot glasses full of this moonshine. And downed them. I had to swallow because the shit pretty much burned my tastebuds off. It was drinking the fires of hell. After doing 4, I needed to smoke but was afraid to on account that I might explode. It tastes what I imagine plutonium tastes like,

10 minutes later, I felt like I was melting. Everything felt like a chopped and screwed record. I've been drunk before but this is nuts. Never doing Everclear again. The only thing Everclear is good for is cleaning rust off of metal and clean a blocked drain. It's sole purpose is to be used for something industrial. Firebreathers use this stuff!
You're use to dealing with basic bitches. Basic shit. All the time.

Comments

  • CryohCryoh Rock Shock Thunderous Beat Joined: Posts: 9,473 ✭✭✭✭✭
    I read the subject and the poster's name, and expected to have a great read.

    Somewhat disappointed.
    Missing Person - There should be a middle ground. But one side refuses to acknowledge the point that being a gamer, being against misogyny, and being for journalistic professionalism and integrity are NOT mutually exclusive, because to concede that would mean they would have to concede that journalistic integrity should be attained and thus they would have to fess up.
  • angelpalmangelpalm ....... Joined: Posts: 14,146 ✭✭✭✭✭
    Last time I drank Everclear, I downed half a bottle by myself in about 4 hours. Where the other hours of that day went is anybodies guess but I still haven't been arrested for any murders so all is well.
    For all that they claim to be women’s natural allies, these schmucks don’t have the first clue about female psychology, or they wouldn’t need to turn to feminism as a sort of invisible date-rape drug. To these self-centered bitter little men bouncing around in their baby bubbles, it’s not really about empathizing with women at all, because they obviously don’t understand how women operate; it’s about scoring with women. It is in this sense that male feminists are more misogynistic than, well, you know, the misogynists.

    Spoiler:
  • iShottoiShotto COME AT ME BRO Joined: Posts: 2,071
    story disappoints...........
    Say hello to your mother for me.
  • ZuluZulu Throb Joined: Posts: 2,832 ✭✭✭
    OH AND I FUCKED MY FRIEND IN THE ASS BAREBACK AND CUM SQUIRTED OUT OF HIS NOSE LIKE WATER FROM THE TRUNK OF AN ELEPHANT!!!!

    Is that what you were expecting? Lol.
    You're use to dealing with basic bitches. Basic shit. All the time.
  • NegroNinjaNegroNinja N-Word Ninja Joined: Posts: 2,620
    Last I remember, Everclear is not a fun drunk.
    AKA Hellpockets/Hotpockets/HaxMurderer/Darth Sharpton
  • DaDesiCanadianDaDesiCanadian orangecat av! Joined: Posts: 6,900
    OH AND I FUCKED MY FRIEND IN THE ASS BAREBACK AND CUM SQUIRTED OUT OF HIS NOSE LIKE WATER FROM THE TRUNK OF AN ELEPHANT!!!!

    Is that what you were expecting? Lol.

    but this just sounds like an average zulu night :(
    http://tinyurl.com/gtasfchannel <-- One click link for the Toronto/Southern Ontario Street Fighter chatroom!

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    LOL Also, 99% implies there are at least 100 people that know me you tard. You really should invest in a proper education instead of being a bum.
  • ZuluZulu Throb Joined: Posts: 2,832 ✭✭✭
    Last I remember, Everclear is not a fun drunk.

    It wasn't. All I remember is that a bunch of people came over, the house was dark, and lots and lots and lots of loud music was played all throughout the night. I gave a chick a massage, and ate like 4 chicken pot pies.

    But the scary thing is this: Drinking it straight is bad but mixing it with something else is even worse because the taste of Everclear goes away. If you mix it with orange juice, all you taste is orange juice.

    Oh and watch this:
    You're use to dealing with basic bitches. Basic shit. All the time.
  • Episode_667Episode_667 Hybrid Dolphin Joined: Posts: 656
    I was expecting a story about the band. Stupid 90s nostalgia :(

    (I didn't even know there was a drink called "Everclear")
    "That's like practicing godhand by playing dynasty warriors." - DropOff
  • RockBogartRockBogart Donkologist, Ph.D Joined: Posts: 25,150 ✭✭✭✭✭
    Last I remember, Everclear is not a fun drunk.

    It really isnt.
  • angelpalmangelpalm ....... Joined: Posts: 14,146 ✭✭✭✭✭
    The taste of anything disappears if you add one drop of it to a fucking gallon of OJ you big fat lady.
    For all that they claim to be women’s natural allies, these schmucks don’t have the first clue about female psychology, or they wouldn’t need to turn to feminism as a sort of invisible date-rape drug. To these self-centered bitter little men bouncing around in their baby bubbles, it’s not really about empathizing with women at all, because they obviously don’t understand how women operate; it’s about scoring with women. It is in this sense that male feminists are more misogynistic than, well, you know, the misogynists.

    Spoiler:
  • sandwichcookiesandwichcookie Unregistered User. Joined: Posts: 1,148
    My experience with everclear: It's flammable.

    (well, actually that was my friend but he's holding my bottle of everclear.. The good shit, 190 proof that you can't buy in california)
    I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
  • Raz0rRaz0r 私は不承認 Joined: Posts: 9,752 ✭✭✭✭✭
    I drank Everclear once at a campus festival when I was in college. I attempted to get naked, had my old ass Jesuit professor fuck with me to his amusement, fell asleep on the steps of a building for about four hours and grabbed more tits and cooch than I can even remember. The following Monday I was known as "AC/DC guy" around campus due to the t-shirt I was wearing. It got me laid for a month until the end of the semester.

    tl;dr - Everclear will get your dick wet.
    This is offensive.
  • ZuluZulu Throb Joined: Posts: 2,832 ✭✭✭
    The taste of anything disappears if you add one drop of it to a fucking gallon of OJ you big fat lady.

    I have a high tolerance so whenever I drink something, I always add more than half of liquor (I'd say 60%). But I added maybe a shot of Everclear into a full red cup of orange juice and couldn't taste a thing other than juice. And even that one shot in a full cup of oj got me buzzed.
    You're use to dealing with basic bitches. Basic shit. All the time.
  • FPStudFPStud team on my back Joined: Posts: 1,553
    i remember my first shot
    [12:10] <@Valaris> the real estate agent opened my closet door to show the potential buyers how big it was... I forgot my fleshlight was right there
  • BiolinkBiolink Shenmue 3 will come Joined: Posts: 4,057 ✭✭✭
    Heed the advice when it tells you to don't drink it by itself.

    We only drank that stuff with Kool-Aid or Juice. Even then your ass can get sloppy drunk just drinking it with juice
    Eleventh Satanic Rule of Earth
    XI:
    "When walking in open territory, bother no one. If someone bothers you, ask him to stop. If he does not stop, destroy him."
  • PapaRhinoPapaRhino HerpinNDerpin Joined: Posts: 5,936
    Everclear will fuck your life up.

    D:
    League of Legends IGN: PapaRh1no
  • angelpalmangelpalm ....... Joined: Posts: 14,146 ✭✭✭✭✭
    Life will fuck your everclear up.
    For all that they claim to be women’s natural allies, these schmucks don’t have the first clue about female psychology, or they wouldn’t need to turn to feminism as a sort of invisible date-rape drug. To these self-centered bitter little men bouncing around in their baby bubbles, it’s not really about empathizing with women at all, because they obviously don’t understand how women operate; it’s about scoring with women. It is in this sense that male feminists are more misogynistic than, well, you know, the misogynists.

    Spoiler:
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