Greatest ST thread ever... We miss you jpj

WolmarWolmar Joined: Posts: 184
This is just the funniest thread I ever read about Super Turbo. Lost in a dead euro ST forum.
It is ALL jpj's. We need you man, more more !!

Here comes :

it's the 21st century. the world is getting smaller. some clever man built the euro tunnel. and more people are travelling to different parts of europe to compete in their favourite fighting games. in this thread i've put together some sample phrases to help you integrate with your european cousins. whether it's exchanging advanced tactics or congratulating them on some solid play, this thread will hopefully break down those communication barriers and you may even make a few new friends along the way smiley.gif


c'est la faute du lag - i blame lag

pas mal tes macros - nice macros

pas mal tes deux coup combo de merde - nice two hit combo of ****e

tu choisis juste les persos cheap? - you only choose the cheap characters?

si tu bloques tu mourra moins vite - if you block you wont die so quickly

mon moment prefere c'est quand t'as triche comme un salaud - my favourite moment was when you cheated like a bastard

tu peux bloquer en mettant la manette en arriere - you can block attacks by pressing BACK on the controller

j'ai assure sur ce coup! - i give myself props for that one!

[when being killed by chip damage]
tu veux du sel et vinaigre avec tes frites? - you want salt and vinegar with those chips?

non, pas ggs sale pute - no it wasn't good games you little prick

ma grande mere handicappe joue mieux que toi, et elle est plutot king of fighters - my disabled grandmother plays better than you, and she prefers king of fighters

[when fighting on chun li's stage on sf2]
tu vois ce vieux poulet dans sa cage? j'suis sur que meme lui a un meilleur ryu que toi - you see that chicken in the cage? i heard even he's got a better ryu than you

putain de salope - ****/****/****

vas faire foutre encule - **** you in the ass

Putain, t'as tout ruiné avec ton combo de merde. - ****, you ruined that ****ty combo

Je m'ennuis - i'm bored

Je vais jouer contre le cpu, Ça serait plus interessant - i'd rather play the CPU, it might be a bit more interesting

[against an opponent who turtles constantly]
Hey, touche-toi au lieu de me péter les couilles - hey, why don't you try and touch me instead of touching yourself

nique ta mere - **** your mother

tu possedes mon ryu, mais tu ne possedes pas une douche - you own my ryu, but you don't own a shower

honda et moi on a les deux la même tête quand on baise - me and ehonda have the same sex face
*visual aid

le dernier match ou je t'ai battu etait tellement bon que j'aurais du l'enregistrer pour mes branlettes - that last match i beat you was so good i should have recorded it for wanking material

t es sur que ton manette est branche? - are you sure your controller is plugged in?

petit poing petit poing petit poing... magnifique! tu fais comment pour envoyer ces combos!? - jab jab jab ... amazing! how do you come up with these combos!?

mec, j'ai deux trucs à te dire: ferme ta gueule connard et arrête de me parler - mate, i've got two words for you: shut your mouth you asshole and don't talk to me

tu suis pas old school, tu êtes play-school - you aren't old-school, you're play-school

tu veux pas te rendre maintenant, comme en WWII? - do you wanna surrender now, just like World War II?

les super reversals aident mon sang à bien circuler dans mon **** - reversal supers stimulate the blood flow to my ****

t'es la raison pour laquelle le monde entier chie sur la france - you're the reason the rest of the world hates france

j'aimerais que quelqu un invente un troc por pouvoir taper les gens par internet - i wish someone would invent a device that let you punch people through the internet

t'es déguisé en rufus là? - are you here to cosplay rufus?

je charge le mètre avant de me coucher comme ca au réveil je fais un super - i build meter before i go to sleep so i can wake up super

tu restes toujours au coin comme anne frank - you got stuck in the corner like anne frank

appelle la police, je dois déclarer un viol - call the police, i need to report a rape

il parait que t'as des macros pour marcher et bloquer - he has macros for walking and blocking

hé, j'ai entendu dire que zizou il peut faire pour de vrai un ultra aprés les coup de boule - yo, i heard zidane can do headbutt into ultra in real life

les francais jouent bison parcequ'au fond d'eux ils restent un bande de mini dictators - the french play bison because deep in their hearts, they're still a bunch of mini dictators

si tu vires le masque et la griffe de claw, je suis sur qu'en fait c est celine dion - if you take away claw's mask and weapon, i'd swear that's celine dion

dhalsim an un pénis extensible, j'ai entendu dire qu'il avait baisé ta mere alors était de l'autre cté de la rue - dhalsim has a stretchy ****, i heard he ****ed your mother from across the street

claw est un persos bon pour le femme, enfants, et les handicappés - claw is a good character for women, children, and the disabled

ta mére ressemble à blanka, en plus poilue - your mother looks like blanka, but with more body hair

hé t'as pas vu le film Gros probléms en petite Chine? c'est une histoire vraie de ma bite et du vagin de chun li - yo, have you seen the movie Big Trouble in Little China? it's based on the real life story of my ****

t'es tellement un noob que tu tiens ton stick avec les deux mains - you're such a noob you hold your joystick with both hands

je ne sais pas ce que je trouve le plus pourri: ton style de jeu ou ta personnalité - i don't know what bores me more, your playstyle or your personality

[when someone on ggpo can't recognise flags and has to ask other players what country they're from]
les seules notions de géo que ce type possedes viennent de l'écran de sf2 sélection des persos
- the only geography this guy knows is from the sf2 character selection screen

pourquoi tu fais que bourrer des jabs, c'est pas (game that shall not be mentioned) ici
- why you mashing jab, this aint street fighter 4

les mexicains prennent toujours bison. son saut facilite les traversées de barriéres
- mexicans like to choose dictator because his high jumping arc makes it easier to hop borders

tu aime prendre dhalsim parceque te battre est considéré comme un crime détestable
- you like to pick dhalsim because that way if i beat you it's considered a hate crime
Against Balrog, it determine the direction Shoryu fist input is difficult. Has been condemned to the left orinput, so right. I try to issue a reversal is born so firmly command you miss wandering.

Comments

  • djfrijolesdjfrijoles First ST player to ever moon a live stream baby ! Joined: Posts: 2,054
    les mexicains prennent toujours bison. son saut facilite les traverséos de barriéres
    <garyangel> ceks,cani,robbiers,yito all mexico players dont know where kyouya
    <garyangel> (((((((((((((((
    <djfrijoles> kyouya is with his gf gary
    <Random.Jab.DP.Spamer> his gf is gary ?
  • fatboyfatboy I beat anorexia: 10-0 Joined: Posts: 1,853
    "dhalsim an un pénis extensible, j'ai entendu dire qu'il avait baisé ta mere alors était de l'autre cté de la rue - dhalsim has a stretchy ****, i heard he ****ed your mother from across the street"

    For Wolmar... :)

    tumblr_mgdtx6arbu1s2wssto1_500.jpg


    As taken from my tumlbr "eltroublesux"
    Am I hungry? Sure, I could eat...
  • eltroubleeltrouble Joined: Posts: 5,722
    TWO new threads in ST on the same day? A busy day here on the ST forums.
    As taken from my tumlbr "eltroublesux"

    So you can't post a picture from the internet on these forums to save your life, but you just "happen" to have a kinky, drawn out picture of Sim raping Cammy ready to go in your 'bookmarked' folder?

    Hmmmmm........
  • fatboyfatboy I beat anorexia: 10-0 Joined: Posts: 1,853
    TWO new threads in ST on the same day? A busy day here on the ST forums.



    So you can't post a picture from the internet on these forums to save your life, but you just "happen" to have a kinky, drawn out picture of Sim raping Cammy ready to go in your 'bookmarked' folder?

    Hmmmmm........
    Just busted out laughing in my office. So true!!! LOL........ Oh, you have no idea..... LOL!! That folder is full of interesting material....
    Am I hungry? Sure, I could eat...
  • DANZANDANZAN NO SQUIGGERINO Joined: Posts: 6,576
    emo filles avec cul serre est agreable.
    angelpalm wrote: »
    People have to complain to counter act that massive influx of idiot gamers that just eat whatever shit pie developers and studios crap out in front of them. If people didn't complain we would all be playing NMS for years right along side the martian.
  • -TheBastard--TheBastard- FAB u LOSE! Joined: Posts: 1,276
    My favorite is:
    ma grande mere handicappe joue mieux que toi, et elle est plutot king of fighters - my disabled grandmother plays better than you, and she prefers king of fighters
    <blitzfu> cool, and bastard is a loser, screen shot that
    <Pasky> he's always trolling, he has a macro button that troll
    <Kyouya>LoL Bastard, best post evah! But you forgot the tiger uppercut!!
    Imagine a snail being able to play fgs, and being a noob in it, it would sure be a salty snail, oh the tragedy of a snail!
  • milesokeefemilesokeefe Spammy Joined: Posts: 387
    El queso es viejo y petrido. Donde esta el sanitarios? - Your playstyle is rather unoriginal. Where did you learn to fight like that?
  • -TheBastard--TheBastard- FAB u LOSE! Joined: Posts: 1,276
    so where in the world is jpj now?

    what jpj stands for?
    <blitzfu> cool, and bastard is a loser, screen shot that
    <Pasky> he's always trolling, he has a macro button that troll
    <Kyouya>LoL Bastard, best post evah! But you forgot the tiger uppercut!!
    Imagine a snail being able to play fgs, and being a noob in it, it would sure be a salty snail, oh the tragedy of a snail!
  • WolmarWolmar Joined: Posts: 184
    I don't know, that guy is a dedicated ST head, or was, since he's not appearing online since a long time. He did tournies at his house (Thunderkicks), he's the funniest ST head I met, but no news anylonger. He's a blanka player, and jpj stands for john paul jones, Led Zeppelin bassist.
    Against Balrog, it determine the direction Shoryu fist input is difficult. Has been condemned to the left orinput, so right. I try to issue a reversal is born so firmly command you miss wandering.
  • -TheBastard--TheBastard- FAB u LOSE! Joined: Posts: 1,276
    he used to be at GGPO back in the days, always fun to read his comments in there, hopefully he plays again soon
    <blitzfu> cool, and bastard is a loser, screen shot that
    <Pasky> he's always trolling, he has a macro button that troll
    <Kyouya>LoL Bastard, best post evah! But you forgot the tiger uppercut!!
    Imagine a snail being able to play fgs, and being a noob in it, it would sure be a salty snail, oh the tragedy of a snail!
  • Bob SagatBob Sagat Akuma Thurman Joined: Posts: 1,547
    Putain, t'as tout ruiné avec ton combo de merde. - ****, you ruined that ****ty combo

    How do you pronounce "ruiné"?
    Roald Dhalsim
  • Zero1_Zero1_ Combo fraud Joined: Posts: 642
    I still bump into him fairly often at offline events, but I think like a lot of us, he just plays and attends for the social aspect.
  • philcitophilcito The Berserker Shoto Joined: Posts: 1,178
    Me gustan las mujeres con grandes nalgas y grandes tetas!
    "You hit coins at the same time as punch, just like philcito does". Bookah
    " I don't snore and I shower daily". Rekkaken

    The Crew - www.nohonorcrew.com/
  • -TheBastard--TheBastard- FAB u LOSE! Joined: Posts: 1,276
    Me gustan las mujeres con grandes nalgas y grandes tetas!
    Translation= Mai Shiranui
    snk-mai-shiranui-cosplay-by-ma-you-rong-001.jpg
    <blitzfu> cool, and bastard is a loser, screen shot that
    <Pasky> he's always trolling, he has a macro button that troll
    <Kyouya>LoL Bastard, best post evah! But you forgot the tiger uppercut!!
    Imagine a snail being able to play fgs, and being a noob in it, it would sure be a salty snail, oh the tragedy of a snail!
  • EvilDindonEvilDindon Joined: Posts: 75
    You should play animal crossing : the timings are not as tough as ST.

  • -TheBastard--TheBastard- FAB u LOSE! Joined: Posts: 1,276
    Well, u guys can still contact him via youtube:
    http://www.youtube.com/user/theycallmejpj
    <blitzfu> cool, and bastard is a loser, screen shot that
    <Pasky> he's always trolling, he has a macro button that troll
    <Kyouya>LoL Bastard, best post evah! But you forgot the tiger uppercut!!
    Imagine a snail being able to play fgs, and being a noob in it, it would sure be a salty snail, oh the tragedy of a snail!
  • jpj1983jpj1983 Joined: Posts: 156
    nice to meet you in toulouse wolmar :)

  • FuddFudd High Level Parking Joined: Posts: 1,215
    Looks like your Bat signal worked, Wolmar. Let's set one up for GigaMSX!
    "See, Super Turbo is a real man's game... But Street Fighter 4's like Chuck-E-Cheese, baby. Y'know what I'm saying? Where a kid can be a kid. I'm a grown-ass man, so clearly I'm not old enough to go in the ball pit." -Steve Harrison (Translation: dat Fo' make you soft)
    Super Turbo Revival
    "Everyone has a plan until they get magnetized." -SpiderDan
    PSN: Metonymous | Battle.net: Noun#1214 | Steam: Noun Proper | YT
  • jpj1983jpj1983 Joined: Posts: 156
    three more:

    j'aie entendu que les scenes de combats dans The Matrix étaint originalement inspirées par ta connection internet
    (i heard the fight scenes in the matrix were inspired by your internet connection)

    je suis tellement violent que j'appris au cpu comment faire un walking flash kick
    (i'm so sick i taught the cpu how to do walk-up flash kick)

    ta mere est tellement grasse que je pex lui faire un crossup de l'autre bout de l'écran
    (your mother is so fat she can cross you up from from full-screen)
  • Okazaki IIIOkazaki III PARRY THAT SHIT SON Joined: Posts: 681 ✭✭✭✭✭ OG
    JPJ = legendary, im proud to have met him. If most players (including me) would be like him, this scene would thrive.
  • Bob SagatBob Sagat Akuma Thurman Joined: Posts: 1,547
    It was pretty awesome to finally have met the master of French shit talking!

    Also, Karan! You're still alive, you crazy SOB?! Next year you're gonna be at X-Mania, damnit!
    Roald Dhalsim
Sign In or Register to comment.