I'm a long time fan, and I am not an idiot with footsies but outside of one game, I felt lethargic and apathetic of most games I play, even the competitive ones.
Halo, street fighter, tekken, gears, they were fun and I got decent at them but I never wanted to play at my very best unless for some certain circumstances made me so.
Something about it brings a bad emotion to me, especially when I play with friends, I rather see them win than myself and I dial a lot of things back.
But when there is a goal or a chance of disappointment with my friends or team, I play my heart out.
I wonder if there's any body with the same problem or once went through this cause Isai from the smash community is what I'm connecting to right now.