Atop the Fourth Wall-Where Bad Comics Burn


#1

I know this should PROBABLY be in the video section, but you’ll let it slide, right Sano? It IS entirely comic-centric, and can probably be best appreciated by the cool kids here.

So yeah, hilarious reviews of bad comics abound. Newest video about Wonder Woman and the lead-in to Amazons Attack is both funny and informative.


#2

It’s fine by me.

Wow I’ve heard so many bad things about Amazons Attack. I only read some of the Wonder Girl issues which were very bad. Someone told me that Amazons Attack has the power to make every bad crossover seem good by comparison. :wonder:


#3

Amazons Attack stands as a unique crap series - like, a month or two after the final issue shipped, the editor of the comic came right out and apologized for releasing such a shitfest. It’s one of those miniseries that ends with “To Be Continued in Firestorm #48! Excelsior!” Straight garbage.

I’m watching the Mr. T and the T-Force #1 review right now. It doesn’t matter what this guy says, nothing can ever take away from the pure awesomeness of this comic. I own that issue and love it with all my heart. One of my life goals is actually to track down Neal Adams himself, and have him personally sign my copy of that comic.


#4

Haha, Uncanny X-Men #423 and #424, Chuck Austen’s greatest story ever. I can’t believe that was a 25 cent special promotion…what a horrible story to introduce new readers too. I think that’s when X2 came out too…good marketing idea but atrocious execution.

This was the story where The Church of Humanity was going to set Nightcrawler up as the Pope and use special communion wafers to simultaneously vapourize Catholics all over the world, to simulate the rapture…and then…I don’t even remember, it was so batshit insane.

All this in a backdrop of a poorly told story full of stupid bible scriptures being thrown around, hilariously reaching for a larger commentary on religion as a whole.

I can just imagine Chuck Austen thinking he was some sort of genius, telling a comic book story but ALSO telling a story about…LIFE. Giving interviews about this, going like “Yeah, well I wanted to tell a story that could do something, and smart readers would notice the deeper meanings and how this story actually relates to real life ideas…”

“Yeah, remember God Loves, Man Kills? This is going to blow that shit right out of the water!”

Like where were the editors!?! How can someone read through this shit and actually proclaim it fit for printing, much less PROMOTING? Where was Ron Garney on this? Dude was probably thinking all the way through like “Wow…what…? Whatever, just draw this shit and get paid. Just think of the money. Just think of the money.”

Fantastic stuff.


#5

…oh man, I actually watched the video…and I really hate this guy.

He’s way too serious, mean-spirited, and long-winded about this stuff. And fuck, THAT VOICE…he’s like the Comic Book Guy from The Simpsons come to life, only louder. He is the absolute stereotypical definition of a comic book snob (like the skinny one that’s friends with the fat one)…this really embarrasses me as a comic book snob.

And no video on the internet should ever be 15 minutes long. THAT IS TOO LONG.

Reviewing bad comics (and bad movies) should be an exercise in fun, not in hate. Like what we do here, there’s no personal grievance against comic book creators. The way he shouts about Chuck Austen here it’s like he murdered his father before writing this comic.

Like the review for Uncanny #423…and how he’s jumping over Chuck Austen for being offensive towards cancer patients and ignorant of world religions…like he’s just a shitty comic book writer, take it easy.

And I’m offended at how a self-proclaimed comic book snob doesn’t even know how to hold a comic book correctly.

Although I have to admit it was pretty fun in looking back at some of these comics, with someone that’s just as hateful (actually probably much, much, much more hateful) towards them now as you were when you read them. His hate for these comics makes mine pale in comparison, it’s like I’ve never hated anything in my life standing next to him.

I am vindicated!


#6

Vindicated
I am selfish
I am wrong
I am right
I swear I’m right
Swear I knew it all along
And I am flawed
But I am cleaning up so well
I am seeing in me now
The things you swore you saw yourself


I’m gonna go watch those Chuck Austen vids now. The Mr. T and the T-Force one actually didn’t seem as hateful as it could have been, but that’s possibly because he was scared of getting his ass whooped by Mr. T. No one is really afraid of Chuck Austen, I think.


#7

Batman #147? Seriously, you’re hating on a Silver Age comic that was printed in 1961?

What a fucking douche.

Seriously, Godzilla vs. Barkley? It’s not supposed to make sense, THAT IS WHY IT IS FUNNY.

I understand now - it’s easy to hate on comics that no one would defend because everyone knows they’re crappy. But if everyone knows they’re crappy already, then what’s the point of these reviews?

What about the balls to actually review a legitimate comic that came out in the last 20 years? Like House of M #1, that comic sucked big time. Or Grant Morrison’s Batman prose issue, dig into that shit. Who makes fun of Mr. T? That’s such a cheap and lazy joke.

Fuck this douche, fuck his gay fedora, and fuck his nasally voice.


#8

I watched the review of the first Chuck Austen issue. At the risk of alienating the state of Canada, I found the video quite amusing. The dude actually seems to have a sense of humor about things. I didn’t even think the whole thing was hateful at all, despite what you claimed, Clinty, in Post #5. (But I freely acknowledge that this could possibly be because I have a high tolerance for elitist hatefulness in comics.) It obviously took the guy some time and effort to make such a smooth video review. I don’t think he stuttered once. And maybe the treble on your speakers is too high - his voice isn’t overly nasally. He’s ALL SKILL, BABY.

What makes it impressive is that we go into these reviews fully knowing that the comics are all shitty (except for Mr. T and the T-Force #1) and he still helps us find new ways to laugh at these pieces of tripe.

Admit it, Clinty. You just hate the dude because he holds his comic books the same way he holds his Asian girlfriend’s ass when he bangs her?


#9

ET TU, BRUTE!?!

His scathing deconstruction of these comics panel by panel, word balloon by word balloon…it’s a fate that a lot of these promotional, purposely campy comics just don’t deserve.

It’s like making fun of airplane food. Everyone hates it already, just because he finds some new facets of airplane food to make fun of doesn’t mean he’s not still being lazy and conservative and still just making fun of airplane food.

Have some balls, have some creativity, go after some real books…like maybe one that was published within the last ten years.

I mean even just for the simple idea that it’s more enjoyable if you can follow along because you’ve read one of these comics before. Not everyone can be as blessed as you are, to personally own an issue of Mr. T and the T-Force #1.

…I also didn’t watch the entire review of Uncanny #423 or #424, so I was forced to make a possibly ignorant snap judgment on the review itself. I regret nothing, 15 minutes of that voice is way too much for anyone.


#10

He’s reviewing Watchmen soon. That ballsy enough for ya?


#11

That might be TOO ballsy for me. Watchmen!?! Like “The Greatest Graphic Novel of All Time” Watchmen? It’s also like 12 issues long…will it be a feature film length review?

He cannot win with me!