How to avoid enemies at work?


#1

Long story short. My girlfriend has been hanging out with this girl and her husband for several months now. It all started out alright. They always would hit her up to hang out and she would come along. They also invited me but I always refuse.

Fast foward now. My girlfriend and the other two work at the same job. Now that they heard my girlfriend will be getting an interview for a full time position, the other girl has been ignoring my girl and maybe even talking shit behind my girl’s back.

Normally this is stupid ass girl drama and I want no part of it but when somebody is fucking with either my family, girlfriend, or best friends future, I will jump in and fight for them.

My girl is worried once she gets accepted into a full time position that the girl and her husband will try to be nosy and rat on her saying how she’s doing a bad job just to get my girl fired so that the other girl’s husband can get the full time position. I told my girl that

“I have fucking told you before, be careful of them, and not to share too much information with them. Now, look what happen, they aren’t your friends, they’re trying to stab you in the back! Since they’re bunch of fake ass mofos, just say hi and smile whenever you see them and then go mind your own business and focus on your job. Just ignore them after you have said hi and FOCUS ON YOUR JOB!!”

She’s still not confident enough that she can do a good job once she gets hired for the full time position. I don’t know what else to fucking tell her other then ignore them fuckers and do your fucking job! I’m about to dump her ass for being so fucking stupid in the first place for not listening to me when I told her not to trust them, but she went ahead and hung out with them cuz she likes having friends… On one side I’m fucking happy this shit happens, so now she knows how some people are and that she should listen to what I tell her! The other part of me feel bad cuz I love her and don’t want her to stress out.

Any advice guys?


#2

Eat more dots.


#3

^ Nice. go eat more d*cks.

BTW: Not only just the couple that are nosy and backstabbers, it seems like the majority of the fuckers at her work are nosy and backstabbers. I’m talking about the men and women. I expect women to be nosy and shit but men? When did men have vaginas?


#4

If the place is really that bad, is it worth working there? I don’t think so. Once you have a “real” career type job, these things don’t usually happen due to people having other worries like a mortgage and shit.

She shouldn’t really have to worry about anything, as long as she covers her ass. Don’t be too nice to them, and then get caught up in some bullshit.


#5

To be fair, I’m a grade A man with a grade A penis, but I can be pretty nosy too. Still, I thought backstabbing was reserved for vaginal units and like, crime bosses and shit.


#6

i backstab all the time, but i’m a rogue so it’s expected.


#7

Best thing to do is for her to concentrate on her work.
She has to learn and grow from this experience , it’s better to start early rather than late.
Support her and love her for who she is, because you already know she has a good heart.

Help guide her, yet allow her time to build confidence.


#8

I feel that way too man. Sometimes I feel like saying to her “you’re fucking stupid, never listens to anything i say!”. It’s true though. When I try to tell her to something like stay away from this person or stop going out too much, she yells back telling me to stfu and that she’s tired of me telling her what to do. Well, now the day has come where she realizes what I have been saying all this time was to save her ass from stuff like this. What pisses me off is she listens to other people but not me eventhough they give her the EXACT same advice I give her… Sometimes I feel I have a huge boulder on my shoulder that needs to be dropped, but not sure how long I can withstand it. The things I hate about her are she thinks she’s an adult which means she can think on her own, but she can’t think for shit. Another thing is she can’t live without friends. She needs a friend in her life. I told her “if that’s how you wanna live, then you’re fucked for life, and i’m dead serious!” Then she goes and telling me to stfu and that I don’t know anything…

P.S nothing pisses me off more than guys being fucking nosy at work. I hate fuckers stare out of the corner of their eyes or hide somewhere and watch me when i’m doing anything… There’s a couple fuckers that do this at my work and man… i try my best to avoid them but they always seem to be close by. When somebody is getting yelled at or the boss is talking to somebody, these fuckers heads are popping out in the corner somewhere staring… I noticed this while i’m on my break. I don’t know why, but I just wanna go BIONIC ARM on their asses. Thats just me. When it’s all said and done, I grind my teeth and smile at them lol… All in a day’s work.


#9
  1. Change jobs if you can.

  2. Document EVERYTHING. This means emails (save them), have witnesses that are reliable (preferably, someone who stands to loose just as much if you do if her enemies succeed, but just about anyone who will vouch for her will suffice), voice recorder if necessary. A cell phone does nice.

  3. Remember that REVENGE is not your goal here, so get the fantasies of getting them fired out of your mind. Your goal is survival, unless of course you have option #1 available. Even then, though, you don’t want to burn any future career bridges either.

  4. Don’t give them any more ‘nuggets.’ They will throw out bait. Expect it and learn to ignore it if possible, mitigate it if not. Remember, survival, not revenge, is your goal. Don’t trust anyone you wouldn’t trust to cash your paycheck. It could be a trap, or inadvertently expose you to one.

  5. Keep your nose clean, meaning stick to doing your work while at work. This is perhaps the most important, since it’s what you should be doing anyway. If you do have a problem with your work or you make some mistake, be honest and forth coming about it so as to minimize your opponent’s opportunity to capitalize on it. Basically, if there’s even a remote chance that they can catch one of your mistakes, then expose it to your manager yourself before they get an opportunity to do so.

Check up on www.shrink4men.com on dealing with high conflict personalities. That site deals mostly with abusive women, but it’s very applicable in the workplace too. I have one in my department and I no longer have to watch my back. I just do my job, do it well and follow the above steps. Every time he’s tried to rat me out to the boss it’s been auto-mitigated and he now has the stigma of a complaining tattle-tale. Ultimate tale of self ownage. g’luck :tup:


#10

EXCELLENT POST!!
:tup:
Some of the things you listed I forgot about/need to look out for, thx man. I hope my girl will take this as a learning lesson not to hang out with shady ass people and stop being stupid!

If there’s any more advice, feel free to let me know guys.


#11

Way to bitch her out at the same time. Maybe she doesn’t have confidence because you talked to her like a fucking dick. That doesn’t sound helpful, that sounds like you’re having a go at her. Show her some fucking respect.


#12

Women. Can’t live with em’, Cant hack them to death with a shovel.


#13

What ever happened to the good old days, when a man would just shoot up an office?


#14

That may or may not be true, but there’s something you have to understand. People mature at different speeds, which is what could be the problem in this case. I’ve had to deal with girls that may be in the same age group, but are just mentally immature. To add to this, I’m what you call an introvert, a person that finds peace from within. Introverted people tend to be seen as loners or what have you, but often time its because they have leader mentalities. An extrovert is the exact opposite. They find approval from those around them, and other people’s opinions of them hold alot of value. Extroverts also tend to need attention or alot of social interaction. I’ve never been the kind of person to want to follow someone else, I’ll never understand it myself. Some people are leaders, some people are followers.

In my opinion, friends are a bonus. They are great and all, but not a necessity. It’s important for people to know this because if they do, they are forced to respect boundaries. I find that your true friends are those that you make in childhood. Anything else is just an associate. Maybe a good associate, but just that.

What you have to keep in mind is that if OP didn’t care about the girl, he wouldn’t bother. People that don’t care about you could care less if you prosper or not, the fact that it bothers him the way it does, means that he cares about her. Thing is, some girls are airheads, and some girls just are not mature mentally. I’ve been down that road with long time relationships, but in the end, if someone is somewhere mentally that is far behind where you are, they will just become an anchor weighing your own progress down. Now it is up to the OP to decide if that’s the case or not.


#15

you have a problem here caused by a woman that only affects you due to your attachment to another woman

switch to men :coffee:


#16

Just do your job and only your job and keep it professional. Don’t talk about other people, regardless if it’s good or bad. Communicate via e-mail as much as possible and save all for records.


#17

Tell her to stop making friends at the office and just do her job.
When it comes to work Keep it as professional as possible.


#18

He’s probably dating her in the first place BECAUSE he talks to women like that, that’s what you’re missing. Be a dick to women, date hotter women. Not good at doing that? PRACTICE. Being nice to women ain’t get you jack shit no more. I don’t like it, but that’s the way it works.


#19

Also, people need to get yelled at sometimes to know they made a stupid mistake.


#20

Why avoid… When you can eliminate.