As Dan Hibiki sat on a rock, gracefully mining gold from his treasure mine of a nose, a grotesque, corpulent man with unfashionable facial hair on a motorcycle rode past him.

“Hey, man! You shouldn’t do that! It’s gross! I used to do that but Candy told me not to do it! She’s totally a hottie! Man I am so l–”

The man died of a heart attack.

the end

Dee Jay rolled up a blunt the size of a baby’s arm and gracefully took three tokes. Sakura ungracefully stumbled over to Dee Jay and began asking about his activities in broken English. After a brief discussion it was decided that she should smoke it.

All of a sudden Guile busts in. “You guys shouldn’t do this. I’m American and in a position of authority, therefore it is my right to take your drugs.” So he took the drugs and arrested Dee Jay and Sakura, who went to separate prisons due to their genders.

E. Honda was at home cooking when he heard a constant knocking at a steady tempo. Assuming it was the front door, he went nearer and realized it was in fact the adjacent window. The way the two were juxtaposed made it nearly impossible to tell the difference, but an anorexic, scantily clad Indian man through the window seemed to indicate the true source of the knocks.

“Come on in, Dhalsim!” shouted Mr. Honda as his friend prepared to teleport into the house. “Yoga!” shouted Dhalsim. “What’s up, my curry-scented starving tomodachi!” Suddenly Dhalsim’s face morphed into a frown. His lips did a Yoga Teleport into the down position. “Yoga…” Dhalsim sadly muttered.

Suddenly E. Honda smelled smoke. “Why shucks, my stereotypical Japanese food is on fire! Come into the kitchen and help!” Dhalsim entered and attempted to help. “Yoga Fire!” “Yoga Flame!” This was a poor idea, as fire does not make fire go away. Instead the entire house burnt down before either of them could get out, whether by means of somersaulting through the roof or teleportation. They both died.

I need more of these wonderful stories!


That E. Honda story… Hahahaha!

One day Sagat was drinking in some bar in Chiang Mai. He drank like 30 Singha beers and was just starting to catch a buzz. He was then approached by a beautiful Thai hooker who said “Oh big man, me love you long time!” Sagat took her back to some hotel and was pissed off to find out she had a penis. Sagat had been drinking so he decided to tap it anyways. He pulled out his gigantic cock and stuck it into the he/She’s asshole and then yelled “TIGER PENIS!”. The tranny then exploded into a million pieces. Sagat then crossed his arm and went “Muahahahaha!”


This part had me rolling. Great stuff.

Dee Jay story was pretty lulzy