For the last 5-6 months or so, I’ve been tryin’ to work out and lose weight and so far it’s been pretty good. Started at 220 pounds and ended up dropping down to about 185.
I also ended up changing my style from the casual t-shirts to Polo’s and whatnot.
(Pic for reference -> http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v213/MagnetiX/Darl-1.jpg)
(me a few days ago at a party, no ballin’ Polo, though.)
Well, anyways, to cut to the point, the most astounding thing about losing weight is I guess women seem to find me sexually attractive or something, but yeah, I finally got my first booty call from some white/Dutch chick a few days ago. It was pretty awesome, like I was at a bar and as I was about to leave with a friend of mine, she calls me over (we’re acquaintances, I guess) and is like “hey, I got some good bud at my place, why don’t you come over and smoke some with me?” and I’m like “oh, sure, yeah, let’s do it up tomorrow or something.” As I’m bout to leave, she’s like “can I get a hug?” and I’m like “uhhh…ok, sure” and as we hug, she starts nibbling my right ear and before she lets go, she just licks that shit and at first I’m like, scared, like what if this bitch is a vampire or some shit, I read Twilight, that shit’s crazy. But yeah, she’s like “I’ll see you tomorrow” and I’m thinkin’ to myself “wow, I’m finally gonna get laid again”
Tomorrow comes, and she’s texting me and at first she’s like “you guys can come over now” and I’m like “oh, aite, I guess I got this all wrong. I feel like an idiot now. I’ll bring two friends along then…” but then she’s like “wait…no, don’t bring anyone, maybe it might be suspicious or noisy, just come alone” or some shit and I’m like “…fuuuuuu yeah!”
I get to her place and she’s fresh out the shower, straight up smellin’ good and shit and I’m like fuck yeah, I’m gonna do it up. It’s around 10:30 at night and we’re talkin’ a bit, then she finally busts out the bud and I’m like, yeah, let’s smoke this shit. An hour passes by and I’m kinda blown but then I’m like “man, I came here to get laid…I should probably start movin’ towards that”
So me bein’ the slick Asian, I’m like "so uhhh…yeah…can I get a replay of last night? You know, a little nibble on the ear"
Mind you, I am high, so I’m probably not as smooth as I thought I was, but she just gives me that :bgrin: like she knew what was comin’. (6 inches of hard Asian steel)
Finally, she’s like “fuck it!” and I’m like “fuck? Like as in, we can fuck? Or should I…do you just wanna do it?” (lol)
Anyways, she lunges toward me and starts kissin me, leads to her room and magic happens for like an hour (no joke, would’ve gone longer but the rubbers got used up :()
Well, this would be a pretty good night for most people, but then she says something that truly made my night, something I’ve always been saying about myself…she says “You know, I like you…you’re good…but best of all, you’re not Asian sized…you’re big.”
At first I thought she was fuckin’ with me so I’m like :looney: but then I was like :lovin: not to her, but to my wang.
The reason I thought she was messin’ with me is cuz I’ve seen some of my friend’s wangs and I mean, they’re not that much bigger than mine but I thought like, what if I’m below average? You know? Like you guys ever look at your best friend’s wang and think "damn, that nigga is packin. I better not whip mine out or else I’ll look stupid."
But now, I think I can rise and stand up with pride.
So basically, SRK, what I’m tryin’ to say is…what raises your self-esteem?
Mine would have to be knowing that the whole myth of Asians having small dicks is just a myth. I was kinda shocked to hear her say it cuz you know, she’s Dutch or something and I know the doods over there pack mad heat. But yeah, I’m just here to report to all my SRK brethren that I, Magnetix, am above average sized on the wang department and this raises my self-esteem.
For anyone wanting to join The Brotherhood of Men with Above Average Sized Wangs (TBoMwAASW), just click right here -> TBoMwAASW
So SRK, what raises your self-esteem?