Who is your Daddy and what does he do? The SRK Newbie Introduction Thread


#1

This is the introduction thread for newcomers so we can ridicule you all in the same place, or if you want to be cool, do like many of us did: lurk for 3 years with no account, make an account and wait 3 more years, then start posting.

Putting this in GD since we had 2 youngins post intro threads in there in the last couple days.

Also, welcome to the Church of Neesa, she whose birthday is everyday. Pay homage young ones.


Neesa Birthday Thread - Hatred In The Lounge, Love In Here
GD specific rules: Read before posting
#2

You first


#3

First rule of GD: All mods are fuccbois

Especially @“The Damned” and @Syke1 , they are hands down the worst mods in SRK history.

Rule 2: Sunday Bunday is for scrubs, Thirsty Thursdays are for real lovers of booty and butt eating.

Third rule and most important: Never go into the lounge unless you want to be spoiled. We’ve had SRK posters kill themselves by violently choking on dicks because they found out the walking dead comic and tv were almost identical. RIP @Raz0r

Good luck.

Oh and Han Solo gets killed by his son Kylo Ren.


#4

Fourth rule, ignore KillaFox :coffee:


#5

The number 1 reason people get flamed/banned on SRK GD is because they are breaking character.
Even though it can be hard, or you just get tired of it, you can never, ever, stop pretending to be a black man.
You won’t even see threads about how “mom wouldn’t let me get my ears pierced” or “had first period- need tampons on the low down in Tohoku” because they get banned/deleted so quickly.
Like, just the other day, like, 13 people were banned in that stupid “class is boring” thread. You just don’t do that shit during JST school hours, go onto google, look up Detroit time zones, and go from there. Simple, but so many young niggas get caught.


#6

Anyone who introduces themself is a fuccboi

Just let your posting history slowly reveal parts of your personality

Or spill all your weak game habits in the relationship thread


#7

Ib4 someone gets themselves banned by marking KillaFox’s post as spam.


#8

I’m trying to forget that I saw that Star Wars spoiler. I ain’t even mad. It’s the most popular movie in the world and I haven’t seen it yet, but I ain’t gonna complain because I ain’t a bitch.


#9

You should add that all new member must pay homage to The Church of Neesa.


#10

Yeah. Well hey, at least when you get around to seeing it, you’ll be with people that appreciate your company.

I only mean to say, I feel like some people don’t have that in their lives. Makes them angry; act a certain way.


#11

I can piss 6ft straight into the air without getting wet.


#12

“Sanford how do I play Sentinel like you?”

Only post I ever seen in the relationship thread.

http://i.imgur.com/PGuWtLR.gif

Man, you get the [Dreamcast LOGO EEK] SHINING FINGAH


#13

WTF IS THIS SHIT!!??

http://i.imgur.com/q3iCWqE.gif


#14

For a newbie thread, all I see are just a buncha old dudes feeling themselves.


#15

Word. We don’t give a fuck who you SAY you are. We know you by your posts.


#16

The realest post I have seen since being on here…

Makin a nigga cry & shit… :cry:


#17

My game secrets 2 potent im saving yall from ending up with 13 kids like me :’(


#18

But with 13 children, at least a few of them are bound to be a Hollywood star, a CEO, or a banker in Wall Street. Just make sure the banker child doesn’t sell you out to those shape shifting reptiles. :wonder:


#19

Hello I am Ben and I am an awful poster


#20

I had that specific spoiler revealed to me by overhearing some shithead at a bar.